Former Brown football player David Howard ’09.5 was convicted of simple assault in District Court on Tuesday,  the Providence Journal reports. Howard was accused of punching a patron while working as a bouncer at Fish Co. in April.

Howard received one year’s probation and payment of court costs, the ProJo reported. He was also ordered to not have contact with the victim, Paul Lilley.

Howard’s lawyer announced that an appeal is in the works.

Police had said Howard punched Lilley several times in the face after escorting him from the bar during a party for Bryant University students. Lilley was taken to Rhode Island Hospital.

In the wake of the incident, Fish Co. agreed to close for three days after a hearing in August.

Check out Thursday’s Herald for more coverage.

It’s time to stock up on those sweet, sweet cloves. Thanks to new regulation passed by the Food and Drug Administration, flavored cigarettes are to be pulled from the nation’s shelves.

But don’t worry — your menthols are safe (at least for now).

In prohibiting the equivalent of the training wheels to a nicotine-tinged life and hacking death, the FDA hopes to curb the number of kids who start smoking in the first place. “These flavored cigarettes are a gateway for many children and young adults to become regular smokers,” said FDA commissioner Margaret Hamburg in a press release. And it may be flavored cigarettes that are helping their habits along; 17-year old smokers are more likely to smoke flavored cigarettes than than smokers over 25, according to the FDA.

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Global health leader Jim Yong Kim ’82, tapped for the presidency of the thirstiest Ivy back in March, was inaugurated yesterday to the sound of choral arias. Proving his worth, he immediately adapted to the university’s reputation for hangover-inducing activities, urging his students to go back to bed:

“Your generation must dream, dream more ambitiously than any who have preceded you. But just to dream is not enough. You must deliver on the dream where previous generations have fallen short.”

The lullaby didn’t work, though, and the thousands in attendance — including Ruth Simmons — loudly cheered for their new second-favorite university leader. Of course, they may have been cheering in anticipation for their afternoon game of (clandestine) pong, but Kim should be okay — after all, he’s already learned the rules.