So it’s Wednesday — Halloweek Wednesday, to be exact — and you realize you don’t have a costume yet. You’re low on cash, you’re running out of time and the creative juices just aren’t flowin’. Luckily, we’ve done all the work for you. Here are five easy, breezy, beautiful (Covergirl) costume ideas we put together at the Salvation Army on Pitman Street to inspire you to drag your ass to WhiskCo tonight (and submit a picture of your amazing costume to the BlogDH costume contest)!
1. The Tacky Tourist
Throw up those peace signs and tell everyone how much you love America! Don’t forget the fanny pack and every vertigo-inducing print you can find. Top it off with a tacky visor, and you’re good to go. You get extra points if you can wear any sort of camera around your neck, especially disposable.
2. Ruth Simmons
Hail to the chief! We know you’re grieving the loss of the Boss, but no need for tears yet! Pay tribute to her greatness and swag by picking up a hot tweed suit and a sassy pair of kitten heels. Flash those caps, give a regal wave and, in true Ruth fashion, be an all-out baller.
3. Lumberjack (or Lumberjill — #BrownHeartsGenderNeutrality)
We know you probably own a plaid or flannel shirt. If you don’t, they cost a mere $3 at the Salvation Army. So throw it on with a pair of jeans and some clunky boots. Grab a hat and scarf and starting choppin down some imaginary trees. Don’t forget to yell TIIIIMBBEEERRR!!!
4. Neo from the Matrix/Taboo from the Black Eyed Peas
You probably know who Neo is. But who’s Taboo, you might ask? Do you remember him from last year’s Super Bowl Half-Time Show? Nope, neither do we. Unfortunately, Fergie’s such an attention whore that Taboo has to take the backseat. He’s that awesome, silent Asian in the Black Eyed Peas who looks like he just stepped out of The Matrix. Show Taboo some respect—come on guys, where is the love? If you own a long, black leather trench coat already…well, to each his own. If you don’t, you can buy this bad boy at Salvation Army for practically nothing. Just wear all black underneath and some strange black shoes and tah-dah!
5. The Bag Lady
You’ve seen her waiting for a bus at Kennedy Plaza, you’ve seen her sitting outside of Better Burger Co., and maybe even in your worst nightmares. She’s the Thayer St. bag lady. Soon enough, we think she’ll have her own theme song. We don’t actually know if she exists but who knows — given the fair share of
freaks lost souls who lurk around College Hill (coughcough MASTURBATOR), anything is possible. So go to Salvation Army, snag yourself a faux-fur coat and raid their collection of hideous $1 bags to get the bag lady chic look.
These are just a few ideas to help you get started. Not only are these options awesome if you’re on a budget, but they’re also environmentally friendly! Buying secondhand clothes is always a better option if you’re trying to be eco-conscious because it’s essentially a form of recycling, keeping clothes out of landfills and reducing the energy that goes into manufacturing some brand new packaged costume. So hop to it, witches and bitches—Halloweek is upon us.