Because Everyone Loves Free Candy: A College Student’s Guide to Trick-or-Treating

College is all about juxtaposing the old with the new, combining the rights of adulthood with childhood nostalgia.  Those songs you loved in middle school are even more fun to sing while drunk!  What better way to procrastinate writing your thesis than by watching old cartoons and playing Pokémon on your Gameboy?  Sometimes, you just have to feel like a kid again, and you can do that on Halloween in the midst of all the more “mature” antics.

Yes, there are some of us who still like to go trick-or-treating.  We’ve all heard about how weird it is that Halloween is on a Monday, but honestly, that’s the perfect excuse.  You can still celebrate Halloween on the actual day without impeding your ability to write that paper due Tuesday at noon, and you get free candy out of it!  Here are some tips to get the most out of being the oldest trick-or-treater on the block:

1. Think about your costume.  Save the slutty or inappropriate outfits for Saturday night (or Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, or Sunday…).  Most adults who live around campus think it’s really cute when Brown students trick-or-treat at their houses, but they’ll be less enthused if their 4-year-olds start asking questions they weren’t planning on answering until the kids reached middle school.

2. Explore!  There are great residential areas by Pembroke (Prospect St, Bowen) and the OMAC, where some of the families go all-out.  Sure, most of the houses you hit will be typical, but the few gems will make the exploration totally worth it.  Last year, one house was completely transformed to represent our country’s “scary” health care system, and its owners were giving out free “vaccines” on the porch (vaccines and not shots, sadly).

3. Be polite.  It shouldn’t even need to be said, but most importantly it will double your candy load.  Providence residents will be so pleased to see teenagers/young adults saying thank you that they’ll encourage you to take more candy.  At least, that’s how it should go.  Hey, they were in college once, too — they know we need fuel for midterms.

4. Have fun with it.  When it comes down to it, you are acting like a kid.  Don’t be mean to the ten-year-old boys trying to flirt with you. Feel free to compliment the toddler in front of you on her costume.  Finally, don’t be embarrassed if the door to a house opens and one of your professors is standing there – Halloween is a much cooler time to get to know him/her than office hours!

When you get too cold to continue going door to door, remember to engage in the time-tested ritual of candy trading with your friends – I think we all have that one friend who, bizarrely, doesn’t like chocolate.  Take some time to unwind from the weekend’s tricks and enjoy your treats!

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