FlogDailyHerald: Disability Services Edition

There are a great number of things here at Brown that, as Rhode Island’s own Peter Griffin would put it, “really grind [our] gears.” Whether it’s unyielding precipitation, the lack of anything to eat after 2 AM, or the absence of cone-worthy food items, there’s an awful lot  to complain about when one’s feeling particularly piqued. That’s why we at BlogDH have decided to roll out our newest recurring feature: FlogDailyHerald, a chance for us to bring to the attention of the Brown community those things that are particularly irksome to the entire campus. You know, those little details that can take a glorious holiday like Chicken Finger Friday and reduce it to little more than a Sunday night dinner at the Ratty (#mysterymeat). Think of it as a chance for us to shout from our electronic proverbial soapbox, “REALLY?!.”

To begin what is sure to be a long and storied tradition of complaining, I would like to bestow upon Disability Services 4 flogs from the BlogDailyHerald staff. Why, you ask? The reasoning is simple. Flog the first comes in light of the news that Disability Support Services (DSS) has jumped on the increasingly popular bandwagon of changing its name from something easy to remember to something ridiculous and counterintuitive. Somehow its new moniker, Student and Employee Accessibility Services, just doesn’t roll off the tongue as nicely. Yes, the new acronym (SEAS) may be more… nautical in theme, but if I actually found things accessible, why would I be calling you to drive me a block and a half to Starbucks?

Flogs two through four shall be administered to O.C.E.A.N.S  SEAS  by this recently anointed cripple upon learning that the van meant to drive the injured around campus doesn’t actually operate on weekends. Instead, students have to wait until 5PM when Safe Ride On-Call begins its nightly circuit to rejoin the outside world and emerge from their reclusive hovels. Who am I, J.D. Salinger? Believe it or not I enjoy human interaction.

Of course, I understand the freakishly nice SEAS  skippers drivers shouldn’t have to work on weekends, but those of us injured in freak trampoline accidents or by other more legitimate means shouldn’t have to twiddle our thumbs ’til sundown to get a ride to the Rock. Won’t someone please think of the kids in Perkins!

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