THE HUNGER GAMES, THE HUNGER GAMES, duh, we’re talking about The Hunger Games. If you still don’t understand this massive cultural phenomenon about teenagers who brutally murder each other in an epic battle to the death while also dealing with massive amounts of unresolved sexual tension, you should probably read this. (Also, you should probably just stop being so lame and read The Hunger Games over break. Dystopia is the new vampire, haven’t you heard?)
The long-anticipated blockbuster is premiering tonight at midnight after a three-year promotional blitz that produced more than enough Hunger Games-related content to keep you busy while you await the reaping. There are the memes, the parodies, the comical press interviews and even the awkward fan videos.
But seriously, it’s supposed to be, like, 80 degrees out today. Plop yourself down on the Quiet Green and just read (or reread) the freaking book. It shouldn’t take you too long; it’s for 13 year-olds.