State of the City: Mean girls, dirty toilets, more ID opportunities

“I totally am 21… It says so right here on my… voter ID card!” Rhode Island’s Secretary of State Ralph Mollis is spearheading a program that is handing out free voter ID cards for residents who don’t have driver licenses or other forms of identification. Residents will be barred from voting if they do not have some type of identification to register. Hey Mollis, I’m sure there are plenty of “21-year-old” voters up here on College Hill who need some of those “voter ID cards,” and I’m sure they’d be willing to ensure the elections went your way… wink, wink… nudge, nudge… cough, cough.

Keeney Quad: the model of cleanliness. The City of Providence will be testing all 3,000 of the city’s fire hydrants in the month of April. According to, “Officials say the testing could agitate main water supply lines and result in discoloration of the water,” and are urging residents “to run the water until it flows clear.” Question: How will students be able to differentiate this specific discoloration from the normal discoloration of the slush that flows through the Keeney pipes?

Stop trying to make “fetch” happen! Video of high-school aged girls fighting each other in Newport, RI, has recently surfaced online. The video has led psychologists to determine that “teen girl violence” is increasing due to social media, which facilitates bullying and extreme emotional responses. This seems like a fairly decent conclusion until you consider that Tina Fey figured out a long time ago that teenage girls are just plain crazy, on and off the computer.

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