The Netflix Files dissects the Air Bud Legacy
Good news. This week, Disney struck an exclusive deal with Netflix to stream its catalog via Watch Instantly.
While theatrical releases won’t start cropping up on Netflix till around 2016 (!), yesterday Disney decided to make available some scraps of kiddie nostalgia just in time for finals period. Netflix is now officially the proud streamer of Alice in Wonderland, Dumbo, The Aristocats, The Fox and the Hound, The Great Mouse Detective and Pocahontas. Exponentially more enticing, the deal also includes rights to marginal Disney entities like The Nightmare Before Christmas, James and the Giant Peach and The Muppet Movie.
The most important revelation of all: some of the direct-to-DVD Air Bud movies are now on Watch Instantly. And because BlogDailyHerald truly doesn’t give a fuck, here’s exactly what you need to know about your favorite athletic Golden Retriever Buddy (and his miraculous English-speaking progeny!), FILM-BY-FILM.
Air Bud (1997) – Wait, you thought you could watch the seminal classic from your childhood? Maybe see if that heroin-addled clown is as creepy now as he was fifteen years ago? Too bad. Netflix don’t have this shit.
Quote: “Ain’t no rules say a dog can’t play basketball.” – Referee #1
Air Bud: Golden Receiver (1998) – The pun in the title was too good for Netflix, so you can’t watch this either.
Quote: “You know what the best part about eighth grade is? Girls are turning into women.” -Josh’s lame best friend Tom
Air Bud: World Pup (2000) – Per Netflix’s description: “Buddy, the athletic golden retriever who dazzled with his football and basketball skills, takes on two new roles: soccer star and father.” Sounds intense!
Netflix Review: “The world pup one was sort of boring, considering the others. I really enjoyed Snowbuddies though. Show me better ones please.”
Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch (2001) – Buddy plays a new sport and vaguely foreign dognappers steal his puppies. Which is exactly the plot of the last movie. Here’s to hoping the kids don’t realize they’re watching the same movie over and over again.
Netflix Review: “i saw Air Bud: Seventh Inning Fetch. and i love the dog flicks are out there i saw some like 101 Dalmatians 102 Dalmatians Garfield Garfield: A Tail Of Two Kities Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey Homeward Bound2: Lost In San Franisco Born To Be Wild Alaska The Amazing Panda Adventure those are my favorite animal flicks. and there’s one i love Wishbone.” Well, okay then!
Air Bud: Spikes Back (2003) – Amidst getting his volleyball groove on, Buddy is framed for robbery. Polly the Parrot joins the series to spice things up. The kids are rioting in the streets.
Netflix Review: “I liked air bud because it was really cute.It is a movie for 7-10 year olds i will say.Its cute on the picture with the dog in the jersey.Kids would love this movie and watch it over and over again.I rated it 5 stars because i thought it was great and awsome and so cute.”
Air Buddies (2006) – Buddy’s puppies have to save him when he gets dognapped. At least now they can all talk!
Netflix Review: “I cannot understand why directors insist upon getting drunk as part of a child’s film.. There is one scene in this movie that absolutely killed this film for me. With all the teen drinking that goes on, it behooves me why a director would include a scene about a puppy getting drunk, falling into a wine vat and cannot walk steadily. Why is that funny? That’t not funny…it’s stupid. These are scenes that children don’t need to see. Alcoholism is not funny.”
Snow Buddies (2008), Space Buddies (2009), Santa Buddies (2009) – I don’t know what the fuck these are, but they’re not on Netflix. Every single one of these movies is directed by the same guy, Robert Vince, who is Canadian.
Sport: I can’t do this anymore I have finals help
Quote: “If we don’t find a warm place soon, we’ll all turn into puppy-cicles!” – B-Dawg. This ended up proving devastatingly accurate when five puppies died on set of Snow Buddies, attracting the attention of the American Humane Association.
Snow Buddies: The Search for Santa Paws (2010) – My life is filled with so many regrets like writing this post and I need a hug
Netflix Review: “I just watched this movie it was great I will be returning it along with nanny macphee I thought I had already mailed it sorry for the mixup”
Netflix Review: “I wish i cud see it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
In summation, probably just study for your finals.