Frosh-cessities: Spring Week is here, whatever that means

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Spring Week is mysterious to freshmen. By this point in our second semester, few things still make us feel like freshmen; we have studying regimes, and there are currently young ADOCH pre-frosh wandering around, reminding us that we’re not even close to as confused as they are. We seem to have it all together.

But Spring Week(end) reminds us that we have not actually been here all that long. Because if you don’t know who Binder is, you don’t know anything.

It’s also difficult to find out things about Spring Week(end).

“Why is it Spring Week? What are the week elements?”

“Because it’s a whole week!!! And it’s the best week ever.”

That is really about as much you can get out of anyone about The Greatness of Spring Weekend. I’m thinking this has to do with the magic really being that inexplicable, and also intoxication reasons.

According to Wikipedia, which is always the solution, here is the most important element of the next six days:

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They also mention the Foam Party, Binder, Spagfest, and SPEC Carnival, but the porta-potties are given the fullest explanation and most attention to detail; the Foam Party has a sad “This is Section is Empty” Wikipedia box – with good reason, apparently.

I, for one, am a little pleased to be feeling totally unaware once again. I’ve heard people genuinely wondering whether they are required to wear their chosen tank tops every day, and started to laugh until thinking, maybe that’s a legitimate concern. When do we sleep? Will there be a pool full of liquor on the Main Green? Can the Ratty really function as an exclusively drunk eatery?! To try to debunk some of these elusive Spring Weekend myths, Caitlin and I employed Jason to impart his sophomore wisdom upon our inexperienced selves:

Myth:  There will be absolutely no form of homework in the days leading up to or coming down from the Spring Weekend high (literally and figuratively).

Reality: I had an organic chemistry midterm last year the week after Spring Weekend—talk about a backside attack. Really, though, start your homework now—be responsibly irresponsible this week.

Myth:  Wriston Quad will become a giant living room between the outdoor couches and the carpet of empty Natty Light Cans.

Reality: I mean … I guess, if you put a slip-n-slide in your living room.

Myth:  Everyone gets a ticket; one ticket counts for the whole weekend; and they are reasonably priced

Reality: Too soon, man. Too soon…

Actually, though, if you didn’t get a ticket today, BCA is selling outdoor tickets later this week, which are contingent on weather.

Myth: It’s a GIANT ORGY all weekend long!

Reality: I think you’re mistaking this for SPG. Seriously though, while there’s your fair share of DFMOs, Spring Weekend is more about celebrating being awesome and having fun with your friends and Kendrick.

Myth:  It will definitely be warm enough to wear my awesome BlogDH tank outside without a sweatshirt/leather jacket/down winter coat.

Reality: We’ll see for sure how pleased the Providence weather gods are on Friday and Saturday, but keep in mind you’ll be out probably anywhere from 1:00 p.m. to 3 a.m.. Maybe a light jacket?

Myth: There will be fun and games besides the usual music and partying!

Reality: Actually, that sounds about right. Slip-and-slides, corn hole, SPEC Carnival—it’s not all about being fratastic!

Myth: I will get to hang out with Kendrick Lamar and become part of his entourage/his BFF.

Reality: Blog can’t speak on behalf of Mr. Lamar as his PR people, but we can say artists have shown up to after-parties in the past!

Myth: I won’t have to do laundry because all I will be wearing are my sick spring weekend tanks and my party hat (which is hopefully a sombrero).

Reality: Buy a lot of tanks, steal someone’s, or do your laundry. Pick one.

Myth: It’s Spring Week, not Spring Weekend.

Reality: It’s more like 12-Days-of-Spring, actually.

Myth: Everyone on campus goes crazy and IT WILL BE TOTALLY AWESOME!

Reality: Go out, be you, have fun. It’s going to be totally awesome.

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