College Hill (W)rap

(BlogDH) College Hill Rap
Summer is around the corner. And if you are like me and plan on staying here in Providence, then you are probably thinking to yourself, “Where the devil am I going to eat?” or “Do locals take over Thayer?”  Two valid questions, but here I only address the former… in rap form:
Antonio’s Pizza is way too cheesy,
And Harry’s burgers leave me queesy,
I need a nice slice of Heaven,
Gourmet foods 24/7.
Johnny rockets towards me, “Did you hear the news?
Kim’s mom is having a Korean BBQ!”
But I got one thing on my ravenous mind,
The paragon of hot sandwiches redesigned:
Let me get Mike’s Calzone,
Don’t like my pizza in a cone.
But I must postpone, Loui’s brunch has got me tweeting,
“Hey @Bob @NCurry on which street are we meeting?”
Later, text my lady friend “Dinner date?”
But depressed Andrea’s in a blue state;
No spice in her life, no buzz in her socket,
Perhaps she wants a reach into my east side pocket?
Just shaved my fro, yo—my fashion’s on lock,
I purchase steel-toe boots to get that iron walk.
Shades plus red-striped, shark-skin pantaloons,
In ABP or BBC, I’m looking like a straight goon.
So ban me (if you please) from this collegiate hill,
I’ll take a drive through Pawtucket for some Garden Grille.
How many references did you count? Tell us below…

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