Review Haikus: Drake’s ‘Nothing Was the Same’

the circle of life

Although we will always remember Drake for his ability to rock the wheelchair in his role as Jimmy on Degrassi, we simply can’t deny that the man has taken over the hip-hop industry. Following Kanye’s Yeezus and HOVA’s Magna Carta… Holy Grail as one of the most anticipated albums in its genre for this year, Drake’s Nothing Was the Same is creepin’ and crawlin’ to the top of the charts after its release on the 24th. Prior to the album drop last week, Drake released four singles, “Started from the Bottom“, which you’ve definitely never heard before, along with three others: “Hold On, We’re Going Home“, “All Me“, and “Wu-Tang Forever“.

Let’s not digress from what may be the most iconic thing about the album itself: the cover art. The album has two different covers, and the rare CD-purchasing fans can pick up either cover in stores. One cover depicts Drake as a toddler, sporting an impressively large afro for someone his age with a comb protruding from it. The other cover, featured on the deluxe edition, shows Drake as an adult bereft of clothing but adorned with a gold chain, le duh. They’re both custom-made oil paintings created for and inspired by Drizzy.

Without further ado, BlogDH presents (trumpets, please): Nothing Was the Same by Drake in haikus. Because there’s obviously no better way to review an album than by writing a haiku about each track. Check them out after the jump.

1. Tuscan Leather
Smart move as first track.
“Alvin and the Chipmunks” songs
draw in the hipsters.

2. Furthest Thing
Nitty gritty Drake,
angsty with boss problems.
He drinks on the low.

3. Started from the Bottom
If by started from
the bottom you mean Jimmy’s
wheelchair, then I guess…

Preach it

Preach, Drizzy.

4. Wu-Tang Forever
Sounds like a bad night
at Finnegan’s: smooth but not
feelin’ it, ever.

5. Own It
Drake at his best with
a hint of The Weekend, plus
woos girls with lyrics.

6. Worst Behavior 
Lonely here, but still
not as bad as Yeezus, synched
over a mean beat.

7. From Time
Combo of airy
duet, orphan Annie sob
story, and piano.

8. Hold On, We’re Going Home
Hold on, Drake can sing
with a good remix, would be
great at Bar Mitzvahs.

9. Connect
Drake sounds v tired.
Keeps telling us that he has
no new friends… kk.

10. The Language
You hear Drake smile
during the hook, which makes the
track ten times better.

11. 305 To My City
Kind of offensive
to the female sex aura.
Don’t objectify.

12. Too Much
Beauty. Emotion.
Like me three days before
my period comes!!!

13. Pound Cake / Paris Morton Music 2
Jay-Z holds Drake’s hand
From kid with afro to man
Nothing was the same

And on that line, Jimmy Drake closes the album that will most likely bring his career to a new level. He raps up his third studio album like a big present from the hip-hop and pop crossover gods (pun intended). The reign of Drake is just about to begin, and nothing will ever be the same.

Mazel tov, Drake!

Mazel tov, Drake!

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