Cafe Blend? Nope, it’s Bear Buzz

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Interesting things are afoot within the V-Dub. If you’ve been by the coffee dispensers at any point within the past few weeks, you may have noticed that the familiar Cafe Blend has been replaced by an intriguing new variety, one that’s guaranteed to get all you Bears out there Buzzing with excitement (you know they thought long and hard about that one).

According to sources within Verney-Woolley, Bear Buzz possesses approximately the same amount of caffeine as Cafe Blend (the exciting ‘Buzz’ label notwithstanding) but contains a differing blend of Arabica and Colombian beans. We sent our resident coffee expert to get the final verdict on Bear Buzz’s quality:

“It’s not bad. Fewer pungent notes than Cafe Blend, with a wholesome body that makes you moderately less likely to gag when you take your first sip. The aftertaste is smooth, and you’ll finish your cup with the grimace of disgust that no cup of coffee from the dining halls should go without.”

There you have it. Something to tide you over until the reintroduction of Pumpkin Spice coffee to the Ratty later this fall (which had better happen soon, or the administration is going to have a whole new level of ‘division in the Brown community’ to deal with).

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