You Are What You Ladle: A beginner’s guide to soup

soup is good for you

The weather is getting worse and Brown students are quickly turning towards the same coping mechanism: soup. I have a strange fixation with soup and I’m not entirely sure why. As I kid, I liked Campbell’s alphabet soup because I liked to spell out words like “Lizzie” and “McGuire.” As an adolescent, I loved Bowling for Soup (see: good band, not angsty, 1985). And now I eat soup whenever I get the chance. Soup is the ultimate lazy food (you don’t have to waste your time chewing it), making it perfect for the slow and rainy start of October. Yesterday, I turned around in the Ratty to find everyone in the front cave with a bowl in hand (Chicken Mulligatawny hooray!). Yet soup is as divisive as it is unifying, and what you choose to slurp says a lot about who you are. Below is a comprehensive guide to soups at Brown. Choose wisely.

Carrot Ginger with Agave (Ratty): Young n’ Hip

The carrot ginger at the Ratty is the perfect soup for when you’re feeling trendy. Nothing is hipper than saying the word “agave” at the end of your sentence. The combination of the carrot and ginger is surprisingly good, but if you’re truly #hip then you’re not surprised because you #alreadyknew. Added bonus: this soup epitomizes Ratty Gourmet, making it perfect for your #Instagram account.

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VDub Chicken Noodle (VDuB): Senioritis Vibes

Chicken noodle is the perfect soup to eat when you’re in denial about your age. Everyone wants to be a kid again (reason: toys) and chicken noodle is the perfect way to reconnect with your youth. The best part: you can mask your fear of adulthood with chicken noodle’s widespread appeal and lack of specificity. Saying that you like chicken noodle soup is like saying that something’s “nice.”

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Broccoli & Cheddar (The Blue Room): Late Night Munchies

Nothing is quite as rich as the Broccoli and Cheddar soup they serve in the Blue Room, where the King of Soup reigns. This soup is creamy and wonderful and perfect for those looking for a late night snack (well, 8:30 pm on weekdays). Unfortunately, Brown offers virtually no soup after hours, so if you’re looking for a late night soup fix, the Blue Room is your best bet.

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Vegan Mushroom Spinach Soup (Ratty): Health Nut

You’ll feel healthy just talking about this soup. It’ll taste okay, but you’ll force yourself to eat it because you know your mom will be proud of you (<3). Actually, chances are you weren’t paying attention and you mindlessly put this health thing in your bowl. Now you have to suffer the vegan consequences.

kelly-ripa-swim-suitNote: soup will not guarantee Kelly Rippa body

Pho (Andrews Commons): The Phreshman

Since the grand opening of Andrews Commons last spring, pho remains the freshest face in the world of Brown University soup. Unfortunately, pho is only offered in ACommons at lunchtime, meaning its primary consumers are phreshmen looking to get their soup phix between classes. Much like going to college, pho takes some time getting used to. You might feel like you’re the only one who can’t pronounce it (phah? phuh?), but you’ll soon learn that no one can.

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Native R.I. Quahog Bisque (Ratty): Thrill Seeking

If you’re eating the native R.I. Quahog bisque, you’re probably not my friend looking for a little adventure. You’ve probably taken a class in every department at Brown, and probably spent your summer white water rafting in the Grand Canyon (and you have the GoPro footage to prove it). Your next big accomplishment: trying this bisque.

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Ramen: Off Meal Plan & Lovin’ Life

Ramen is the food of choice for those off meal plan and livin’ the sweet life off campus. Ramen is the perfect food for off campus dining because it’s just about the easiest thing to make (put that fully equipped kitchen to good use!). Plus you’ll feel like an adult eating it BECAUSE YOU MADE IT BY YOURSELF (Take that mom!).

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SciLi “Soup”: The Studious Type

If you’re eating the refrigerated “soup” they sell at the SciLi, you’re probably ravenously hungry from your late night study sesh. You’ve arrived at the Friedman café to find that they’re out of everything except Blount’s Creamy Tomato. Pro tip: Eat anything else. This soup is a tasteless waste of points.

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And finally: Coffee. Coffee is the soup of the people.

 

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