Lost in Textlation: Brunonia style

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A Brunonian attempting to discern a text’s meaning.

“Hey, wanna meet up?” A casual text, commonly seen around 8 p.m. on Thursday through Saturday nights. This can come in many versions, and is a pretty innocent question. To preface, once upon a time an influential “bro” named Jimmy Tatro attempted to explain the difficulties of getting lost in textlation in a hilarious, on point video describing the intricacies of the college social scene. While it accurately described your average weekend night, Blog thought that some Brown-specific advice could be helpful, helping to navigate some potential situations you could get yourself into. Here are some of these possibilities, and what they might mean for your night.

“Wanna go study at the  ____?”
Sci Li – The SciLi is where dreams go to die – they actually want to study.
Hay – Again, unless they’re going to a side room, they don’t plan on socializing with you.
Rock – Whether it’s on the main floor or carols, they want to get to know you and chat for a bit.
“Wanna go work out at the ____?” 
Keeney/EmWool – They probably don’t know how to work out, and are a bit confused about good fitness spots on campus.
Nelson – They want to impress you, and show off to everyone there.
Bear’s Lair – They actually want to work out, the gym equivalent of the SciLi.

“Wanna go eat at the ____?”
Blue Room/Ratty/VDUB – They want to socialize, and know they will run into some friends.
Poppy’s – They’re a bit confused about where to buy food on campus, the food equivalent of the EmWool gym.
Thayer – They want to spend more time getting to know you, even if it’s not a “date” spot.
“Wanna go to party at ____?”
Dorm Pregame – They probably want to impress you in front of their friends.
Sports/Frat Party – They may just want to drink and socialize.
Bar/Off-Campus Party – A low-key setting means more one-on-one time with you.

Superimposition

Now that we’ve gone through the basics, be on the lookout next time you get one of these, and pull up this tip sheet to consult instead of over thinking a casual text. Voyage on, and don’t get lost in textlation.
 
Images viavia.

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