We all know that Ellen Degeneres (read: Hank) is America’s sweetheart, and now it seems that Providence has become the Ellen of America. According to Travel+Leisure, Providence ranks as the #1 Top City Overall. Move over Los Angeles and New York – it’s time for the underdog to shine!
Travel+Leisure compiled responses from many surveys that asked readers to rank certain aspects of a city that ranged from sandwiches to gay-friendliness, on a scale of 1-5 (5 being the best). Providence seems to have weaved its way into many of the categories’ top spots! For example, it is considered the second best city for street food (go Mama Kim’s!), the best city for diners, and the best city for bakeries. Yes, I’m just focusing on food here, because, really, all you need is food.
Rankings are always an iffy topic because they tend to be extremely subjective, and Brown doesn’t always fare too well in those that “matter,” whatever that means. But hey, these Travel+Leisure rankings are basically telling us that we’re living in the best city out there, so I guess we can roll with that.
Forget that you’ve never heard of the website before, and forget that they left out Dave Binder: Baeble Music heard about the party we’re throwing this weekend, and they approved, ranking Brown’s Spring Weekend the Top College Music Festival of 2014!
They may have left Dave Binder’s show out of their blurb, but the photo they chose speaks volumes.
The win is no small feat, as the website ranks us among other top contenders like Vanderbilt (whose “Rites of Spring” fest lasts two full weekends), and Yale (whose Spring Fling lineup eerily resembles ours, but without the added Providence flair of What Cheer? Brigade, as the listicle notes).
The Columbia Lion published a complete list of spring lineups around the Ivies, a list which further, incontrovertibly, proves how dominant Brown’s lineup is among those of our peers. And can we take a moment to make fun of Princeton for calling its event “Spring Lawnparties”?
Princeton’s “Lawnparties” Lineup did not make Baeble Music’s list.
…And by ever, I mean in the United States in 2014 according to Livability.com. Yep, PVD beat out urban luminaries such as Indianapolis, Eugene, and Provo. (You couldn’t find 10 downtowns better than Provo?) Only Fort Worth, Texas beat out Providence. Livability didn’t just make this up; they had some impressive statistics on their side:
The public library was recently redone.
Half the office space in Rhode Island is in downtown Providence.
The city’s median age is 28.
The city’s workers only have to commute an average of 16 minutes to work.
We have WaterFire.
Also, the above picture is clearly a fabrication. It seems to imply that the trees will at some point sprout leaves and that it at some point will be warm enough to walk around in short sleeves. Lies.
Huffington Post, apparently having run out of ideas for best-oflists, has deemed Brown to be among the most interesting schools in the country. It’s unclear what actually counts as “interesting,” considering that other colleges qualify due to anything from partying a lot (ASU/UCSB) to not being racist (congrats University of Alabama?) or the occasional cheating scandal (sorry, Harvard).
Brunonia’s qualifications, meanwhile, are predictably mainly related to nudity, protests, and… Pixar? Well, at least they didn’t talk about O’Reilly and Jesse Watters.
As 2013 comes to an end, the Internet is ripe with end-of-the-year “best of 2013” lists: best photos, best songs, movies, and of course, best university confessions. A post on Brown Confessions made BuzzFeed’s Craziest College Confessions of 2013. Which confession? you might ask. None other than “I’ve been faking a British accent since I got to Brown and it’s gotten me so much pu**y.” Satisfied? I personally think there were a lot better ones this semester. So with that, let’s recap the top six confessions of this semester:
The creep: “I knew the telescope that my grandpa gave me last summer in Weehawken would come in handy. I live in the Keeney quadrangle and some nights, when my roommate is out, I use it to look into the rooms of the girls across the courtyard. Those lollipop undies are so hot. Next time you leave the lights on, keep the shades up, I’ll be watching…”
The most blasphemous: “I had forgotten that Brown University Compliments existed until a rogue post appeared on my news feed today. Sorry BlogDH.”
The existential crisis: “I am a senior and I am beginning to F R E A K T H E F U C K O U T about my impending real adult life.”
The asshole: “I pretend to be on board with my girlfriend’s feminist causes because she is really hot and our sex is great, but also because I know it comes from an insecurity that I can exploit when I need to. Yeah, come at me Brown.”
The most relatable: “Sometimes I treat myself and I go to the Ratty soda dispenser and I pour a little ginger ale, let the foam sit, and make all these bitches wait for me to pour a little more and let the foam sit again, and repeat until I have a sexy ass full glass of delicious ginger ale.”
The daredevil: “Just let out a (hopefully) silent 10 second fart in the Absolute Quiet Room at the Rock while wearing headphones. This is how I live dangerously.”
In a completely subjective ranking by HerCampus.com, Brown has been deemed the most progressive school in the nation. Considering we’ve dipped our toes in the top lists of sexiest, hipster-est, and happiest schools–just to name a few–it only makes sense that we’d come out on top in an all-encompassing ranking of liberality and forward-thinking. Being labeled as the “most progressive” basically covers all the artsy/alternative/offbeat/generalize-as-you-will bases in one foul sweep. In other words, Brown continues to be regarded as the shit.