Monica Bruinsky

Sextion: Answering your Brown Confession sex etiquette questions

By: / March 6, 2014 / No Comments /

Sextion

Hello wonderful readers and welcome back for another (a)rousing Sextion post! As springtime approaches (we almost didn’t have snow this week!), things are going to get steamier than the windows in the Nelson on a busy winter day. Recently, I have scoured our lovely Brown University Confessions page and selected some important sex-etiquette questions that deserve some answers. Have any more questions? Feel free to email me at monicabruinksy@gmail.com!

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This first question depends on a lot of different factors, as illustrated by this lovely flow chart! Follow it down and you’ll know whether you can simply text the person asking for your item back or give up hope of ever seeing it again.

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Sextion: Four more sensitive body parts to stimulate this Valentine’s Day weekend

By: / February 15, 2014 / No Comments /

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Editorial Disclaimer: This post has been created by college students for college students.  It has been rated NC-17 for its sexual nature and anatomically graphic references. Please proceed at your own risk. Thanks for reading! Love, BlogDH

Last year, I told you about four of the most sensitive parts of the human body to make your Valentine’s Day Weekend (yes, it’s a weekend.) especially enjoyable. Clearly, you all enjoyed it so much that it was one of the 10 most-read Blog posts of 2013, so thank you! Now I’m back to tell you about four more body parts that you and your partner can use this Valentine’s Day to really heat up this incredibly chilly winter:

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Sextion: Six tips for great Skype sex

By: and / February 9, 2014 / 1 Comment /

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Despite some of our unhealthy relationships with Siri, akin to Joaquin Phoenix and Scarlett Johansson in Her, technology can be an amazing tool for maintaining real-life relationships, especially sexual ones. Whether you have a vibrator that is synced to your iTunes or a pillow that allows you to hear your partner’s heartbeat wherever they are, technology can be a beautiful thing. And for those in long distance relationships, it’s a necessity.

Because we’re not living in the dark ages, where hand-written letters and the occasional phone call were the only things connecting you and your partner, we have amazing inventions to keep people closer together, even if they are a world away. Skype has grown to be every long distance relationship’s third wheel. Skype, to me, is the most sexually revolutionary product since the Pill, and Skype sex is now a luxury for couples everywhere. So whether your partner goes to a different school, is abroad this semester, or is your 35-year-old neighbor back home, read below for some tips on how to make the most of your Skype sex experience.

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12 Days of Flogmas, Day Five: Midterms just before finals

By: / December 11, 2013 / No Comments /

Midterms Flogmas

As I’m sure you have all recognized as early as your first month at Brown, the word “midterm” doesn’t necessarily mean that the test takes place in the middle of the term, as the definition below suggests. Instead, midterms occur all-year round and happen about once a month. Why professors even call them “midterms” completely boggles the mind.

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Regardless, they’re exams, and horrible exams in general. We’re able to get through them, for the most part; but when a midterm is scheduled the week before reading week, or better yet, during reading week, that is just cruel. CRUEL. It is not a “midterm” and it is not fair. And here is why:

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Sextion: A happy Spanks-giving to you all

By: / November 28, 2013 / 1 Comment /

SextionEditorial Disclaimer: This post has been created by college students for college students.  It has been rated NC-17 for its sexual nature and anatomically graphic references. Please proceed at your own risk. Thanks for reading! Love, BlogDH

As we sit down to our lovely Thanksgiving feasts with our families and friends, we must think about the things in our lives for which we are thankful. Last year, we were thankful for my tips on hickey removal before we went home to Mom and Dad. This year, I am of course thankful for sex. But even more than that, I am thankful to find partners who are receptive to trying new things in the bedroom, that I feel comfortable sharing my personal desires and kinks with, and who are open to enacting those fantasies that tend to remain tucked up inside my head. One such fantasy is spanking, and I’m sure I’m not alone in that. In the spirit of this most wonderful holiday, I am here to give you Monica’s Spanks-giving tips. Whether you’re seasoned in the art of spanking or new to the practice, these tips should help ensure you and your partner make the most out of this most wicked activity! Continue Reading


Sextion: How to talk to your family and friends about SexPowerGod

By: / November 2, 2013 / 2 Comments /

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It’s that time of year again, folks. Sex. Power. God. And for those of you, like myself, whose parents asked a lot of questions about the SPG posters across campus during Parents Weekend, you may have had a lot of explaining to do. So how do you talk to your parents about SPG? Or to friends from other schools who have heard about Brown’s raging sex parties? Here are some helpful things to say if you’re a tad bit tongue-tied and want your tongue to be tied with someone else’s at SPG:

1. The Basics: SexPowerGod, or SPG, is the largest annual dance put on by a student group here at Brown. In the last few years, approximately 600 students were given tickets. This year, only 400 tickets were sold. The event is put on by the Queer Alliance, and it’s entirely student-run: students plan every aspect of the event, from the postering to the DJing. Since the event is put on by the QA, many posters advertising the event feature queer students and activities, though it is designed for students of all sexualities, and all tend to be well-represented. It is meant to be a safe space where students can feel comfortable exploring their bodies and their sexualities without fear of judgement, but in recent years, the rules about what is and is not acceptable at SPG have become much stricter. Even so, you will most likely see things you haven’t before. And that’s okay. It is an opportunity for all to test the boundaries of their comfort levels. Continue Reading


Sextion: Halloween costumes and the sex they inspire

By: and / October 31, 2013 / No Comments /

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Editorial Disclaimer: This post has been created by college students for college students.  It has been rated NC-17 for its sexual nature and anatomically graphic references. Please proceed at your own risk. Thanks for reading! Love, BlogDH

Monica and I have seen a bunch of wonderful Halloween costumes at parties recently, and we wanted to talk about how they inspire us. And really, how else would they inspire us besides inspiring us sexually? Halloween is the perfect time to get your sexy on, and there is no better time for role-play. We decided to take the opportunity to throw out a few suggestions for sex positions and acts that we think go well with the sentiment of several popular Halloween getups.

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Sextion: “Genitarchitecture”

By: and / October 11, 2013 / 2 Comments /

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With all this talk of nudity at Brown, we can’t help but think about bodies. We’ve been thinking about specific body parts in particular, and we’ve come to notice all of the phallic and vaginal structures on Brown’s campus. Your two Sextion writers have decided that Brunonian “Genitarchitecture” definitely exists and needs to be fleshed out further. Take a look at what we’ve found to be the most gonad-related architecture on Brown’s lovely campus after the jump. Continue Reading


Sextion: Summer and your sexuality

By: and / September 20, 2013 / No Comments /

School’s finally getting back into full swing. We’re beginning to settle down and get into our familiar routines. With all of our acquaintances asking “How was your summer?” without really wanting to know the answer, we can’t help but reflect on this summer and all that it did and did not give us. Some of you were in entirely unfamiliar territory, trying to navigate meeting and hooking up with new people. You were living away from your significant others, and forced to use Skype as your primary means of *cough* sexual release. For our first Sextion, then, we got those summatime summatime sexcapades with Margaret Snatcher and Monica Bruinsky:

Summer Sexual Ventures (or lack thereof) — Margaret Snatcher

I recently came to the realization that summer break was playing a cruel joke on my libido. Summer is the perfect time to have sex, and lots of it. Plenty of free time, gorgeous weather, and tan, toned, half-clothed people. There is nothing that makes me hotter than remembering that I don’t need to be hunkered down studying for a midterm. No school stress = more sexual vigor.

So I should have been getting some, right? Well, unlike the apparent half of the Brown student body that decided to stay in Providence, I went to another part of the country this summer. I got up at 7 a.m., worked a full day, and then wound up sitting on the couch exhausted by 6:30 p.m. or so. This happened basically every night. Sadly, if a naked Alexander Skarsgard had wandered past me emanating his usual erotic aura, I probably wouldn’t have been able to stay conscious long enough to make it through foreplay. Continue Reading


Sextion: Mixing studies with pleasure

By: and / May 6, 2013 / 2 Comments /

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For many of us, reading period and finals are a stressful time of papers, exams, all-nighters, and little else. And though, as we posted about last semester, it is important to give yourself a little self care, you can’t afford to blow off steam like you may have earlier in the semester. Getting drunk and going out seems nearly impossible when you’re pulling consecutive all-nighters trying to get your shit done. You can’t afford the day-long hangover, nor can you stomach a diet of Powerade and Pepto-Bismol.

If bodily destruction isn’t in the cards right now, you need an alternative. Instead of hurting your liver, why don’t you give a gift to your body this time around? Why not do it while simultaneously enhancing your studies? We know that sexual activities have all sorts of stress reducing and health beneficial properties (that don’t include destroying any internal organs), and you can do them while still being productive.

So here are Caitlin’s ‘creative’ methods for studying and being sexy:

Strip paper: We’ve all heard of strip poker, strip monopoly, strip crazy eights (okay, maybe some of us haven’t heard of that one)—now it’s time to welcome strip paper! All you need is any form of a written assignment to work on, and the concept is simple: for every paragraph you write, you remove an article of clothing.  For all you kids out there with ten-page papers: things are about to get sexy. Continue Reading


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