FlogDailyHerald: VDub fruit

I don’t think it’s controversial to say that the VDub is a better dining hall than the Ratty. While the lack of weekend hours can be a real bummer, most of the fare is of consistently higher quality than Ratty analogues. The bagels, for example, are massively superior at the VDub. I need not even mention the glory of Chicken Finger Friday, which consistently draws an enormous crowd. Unfortunately, all is not beautiful and pure there; something sticks out of the the rest of the scrumptious offerings, impinging upon the senses with its low quality. I speak, of course, of the fruit.

VW Apple

Lucifer’s going to have a hell of a job getting me to eat this one.

Green, brown, the occasional odd shade of orange. Most of the fruit at the VDub is stunted, sour, and inexplicably substandard. Where the fruit at the Ratty is usually high quality, the counterparts at the VDub at like some sort of twisted reflection of what fruit should be. Of all the fruit that gets put out, only the oranges and, on occasion, the bananas have been satisfactory on any consistent basis. I recall one halcyon day when there were actually good apples, visions of beauty that shall not come again.

Is this simply a matter of balance in the world? Must the rest of the VDub’s greatness come at this terrible price? No, I can’t accept this. I know it can do better. Is this like a sibling situation, where the VDub gets the hand-me-downs that the Ratty won’t use? Surely some of the Ratty’s golden apples could be spared for our favorite Pembroke dining hall.

Disappointing fruit is a terrible thing. Crisp, fresh fruit can be the factor that makes a breakfast worthwhile. I don’t see any reason why the VDub ought to languish in mediocrity. Whatever harvest deity watches over Pembroke needs to get of their lazy ass and do something about this.

Image via Steve Dowd ’15


12 days of Flogmas: TV show winter breaks

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As I have been informed by many of my friends, finals period for some people actually means watching less TV than you would be able to otherwise. As much as they have tried to explain this concept to me, I remain confused. What are you doing all day? Studying? But you still eat right? And breathe? Okay, then I don’t get it…

As I have tried to explain to them, some individuals, myself included, actually see reading/finals period as a great opportunity to spend a few extra hours watching TV as a way of preserving mental sanity. Sure, I still work, but if I’m going to spend an entire 60 minutes working on a paper, I’m gonna need a 90-minute reprise (I already feel like I’ve been writing this article for an eternity). Continue Reading


12 Days of Flogmas, Day Eleven: The laundry experience at Brown

Santa Bear Flogmas Laundry

I’m very grateful for laundry machines. I’m glad I don’t have to go out and break ice in the Providence River to wash my clothes. I can afford to have a machine do that for me. But that doesn’t mean laundry is a perfect experience.

Here’s how an ideal laundry load goes:

  1. Put laundry in washing machine. Add detergent. Start.
  2. Wait 34 minutes.
  3. Transfer laundry from washing machine to dryer. Clean the lint out from the screen — fun times! Add dryer sheets if you’re one of those people. Start.
  4. Wait an hour.
  5. ????????
  6. Profit.

Here’s how it usually happens at Brown: Continue Reading


12 Days of Flogmas, Day Ten: The SciLi bathroom sitch

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A long day of studying is like a long night of drinking, in the sense that you always have to pee. Between the absurd amount of water you’re consuming because you don’t have time to eat and the hourly venti lattes, urination (amongst other forms of bodily excretion) is a must. Since the SciLi is such the go-to prison cramming location, you’d think it would be able to accommodate our relentless bathroom needs. Right? Wrong. VERY, VERY wrong.

I do most of my SciLi work in the basement, which fits more people than any other floor. It also happens to have the worst bathroom situation—not only on campus, but perhaps in the world. Let me spell it out for you: there’s one female bathroom and one male bathroom (problem #1 arises: gender neutral, where are yoooouuuu?!). The bathrooms contain a sink and a single stall, in which is a single toilet.

So it appears that the SciLi basement bathroom is single-use, assuming that only one person is using the toilet at a time. Hold up… you’re catering to a room with an occupancy of 336. Only one person per gender can go to the bathroom at a time? If you’re going to make it so exclusive, you might as well put a lock on the bathroom door and call it a day. Enough with the false hope of a swinging door. If you’re only going to present us with one stall in a faux-multiperson restroom, at least make the rest of the bathroom large enough to fit the four people always waiting in line. I’m done with being slammed by a swinging door that shouldn’t even have the ability to swing.  Continue Reading


12 Days of Flogmas, Day Six: Crossing Waterman

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If I could avoid Waterman Street—potentially the most difficult thing to cross since the Red Sea—I would. But alas, it is smack dab in the center of campus. So, I, like most Brown students, encounter it every day.

What makes crossing Waterman so unpleasant is not the fact that it is a main artery (or at least as main as any street in Providence can be). I have eyes and ears. I can cross the street.

There are two main reasons why the Waterman crossing experience sucks. Firstly, at the corner of Waterman and Thayer, the Walk/Don’t Walk sign never ever displays the “walk” signal. When I say “never ever,” I’m not using it idiomatically. I have actually never seen that beautiful fluorescent man purposefully walking to his destination. Instead, I am greeted every time by that obnoxious red hand.

Continue Reading