12 Days of Flogmas, Day Five: Midterms just before finals

Midterms Flogmas

As I’m sure you have all recognized as early as your first month at Brown, the word “midterm” doesn’t necessarily mean that the test takes place in the middle of the term, as the definition below suggests. Instead, midterms occur all-year round and happen about once a month. Why professors even call them “midterms” completely boggles the mind.

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Regardless, they’re exams, and horrible exams in general. We’re able to get through them, for the most part; but when a midterm is scheduled the week before reading week, or better yet, during reading week, that is just cruel. CRUEL. It is not a “midterm” and it is not fair. And here is why:

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12 Days of Flogmas, Day Four: Blue Room booth-hoggers

Santa Bear Flogmas Booth

This time of year is hard for everybody. Some are drowning in work, others are stressed about jobs; some are worried about getting through their holiday gift lists in time, others are worried about surviving the winter weather. We get it: everybody has something. And we all have different ways of coping with it. But one thing is unforgivable; one thing, we will not let you get away with: hogging up the precious sitting area that is a Blue Room booth.

The Blue Room is the epicenter of campus. It’s ideal for meeting up with people, for carbo-loading before a long night at the Rock, and for running into people you have been avoiding haven’t seen all semester. But somewhere between the social butterflies and the enticing aroma of muffins, people forget basic etiquette. I could go on about messy tables, huge crowds around a four-seat table, and the 4 p.m. dinner rush—but I’m fighting a different battle.  Continue Reading


12 Days of Flogmas, Day Three: Table manners at Brown

Santa Bear Flogmas

Table manners aren’t just for stuffy family functions. There is a proper etiquette to Brown dining, and the dining en masse nature of campus eateries doesn’t exempt you from basic table manners. Here are the three cardinal rules of on-campus dining:

DO NOT (excuse the caps) LEAVE THE TABLE MESSY WHEN YOU LEAVE.

The most common instance of this egregious behavior is at Jo’s. It’s understandable why people would leave the tables messy at Jo’s right around closing time on weekends. You’re blackout, and when the lights start flickering at 1:55 a.m., they trigger a zombie-like response within you: “mustt leavee jooos eattt brainnnss.” In fact, you don’t even know whether someone is switching the light on and off or if you’re just about to lose consciousness. This confusion may lead to you abandon your table and thus throw your table manners out the window. As the wise sage R. Kelly once said, “[you’re] like ‘so what [you’re] drunk.'”

However, there’s really no excuse to leave a Jo’s table messy at any other time. Continue Reading


12 Days of Flogmas, Day Two: Cold weather behaviour

unnamedUnfortunately, December 1st has come and gone, which means two things: 1) the semester is ending soon, and everyone is entering finals mode, and 2) winter is coming winter has officially begun.

To be clear, winter weather has been present for some time, but now calendar-wise there’s no space to claim it’s still ‘fall’ and go about wearing shorts. There’s something about college— the lack of mothers around, probably—that makes people think it’s okay to wear flip-flops in 30 degree weather. It’s not. And we’re going to call you out on it (and other things that are no longer acceptable now that the temperature has dropped.) Here’s a FlogDailyHerald for all you cold weather fiends:

1. Shorts. Unless you’re going to the gym, are coming back from the gym, or are some sort of yeti, there is no reason to be walking around campus barelegged. (Also, I sort of think it’s not even that okay to wear shorts outside for gym-reasons; just change when you get there…) In the same vein, the female-presenting folk that walk around in shorts/skirts without tights: what are you trying to PROVE? Goosebumps flatter no one.

2. Open-toed shoes/shoes that don’t require socks. We love sandals as much as the next sartorially conscious phe, but spring/summer have come and gone. Let’s close that chapter until March April May. We promise that allowing your toes to bask in sunshine will be much more satisfying when they’re no risk for frostbite. [Insert joke about getting cold feet about your planned outfit here. Ha!]  Continue Reading


12 Days of Flogmas, Day One: J. Walter Wilson

In order to get you young whippersnappers in the scrutinizing mode for finals and hopefully a jolly mood for the holidays, your one and only true Blog love brings you the 12 Days of Flogmas. What is a Flog, you ask? Why, it merely consists of the best, most poignant, sometimes earth-shattering criticisms of perhaps the most trivial, yet gear-grinding aspects of life at Brown (see our FlogDailyHerald column). We feel this is particularly fitting during our collective finals catharsis, and we’ll keep it coming for 12 days. Take a sip of your FlogNog and let the festivities begin…

Oh, J. Walter Wilson, how I hate thee. Home to our mail boxes, mail services, and a number of unrelated offices, JWW is a hub of student traffic. Whether you have a language class in there every fucking day or you just stop by to pick up your mail, we are all too familiar with it. There are certain questions one is faced with upon entering the building, most of which have to do with its construction. The most pressing of which is what the architect was actually thinking when designing the building. The way things turned out, you’d think he or she was pulling a Rob Ford. Here’s why: Continue Reading