Just when you thought Spring Weekend couldn’t get any more exciting — BAM! — we’re about to throw another winning element into the mix. First announced last week via Facebook, the Greek Council will be sponsoring a night of getting Fratty in the Ratty this Saturday, to help fill that awkward time between when the concerts end and you haven’t quite rallied to rage (yet again).

For the first time ever (we think), the Ratty will be opened from 9–11 the Saturday night of Spring Weekend to provide the ecstatic drunk masses with free food, non-alcoholic drinks (read: mixers), and a little post-concert pump-up music courtesy of DJ A-BE. No need to worry about being off meal plan — the event will be open to all students and guests, including those RISD hamsters.

The only thing that could make this better would be shotgunning a beer with Gail. Does anyone have a keeeeeey?

Sláinte Mhath! The leprechaun and pot of gold have adorned our masthead, which means it must be St. Natty’s Fratty’s Spatty’s Paddy’s Day!  And this isn’t just any old Saint Patrick’s Day. It’s a Saturday. It’s pretty nice out. Spring break is around the corner. Odds are that some people reading this post are going to drink, and one (or more) of them is going to take his/her anger out on an exit sign.

This, of course, would not be an isolated incident . You’ve all at least witnessed (or have taken part in) the notorious freshman pastime of celebrating newfound freedom by obliterating a public safety device. No matter where you go (at least in Keeney), you probably will find an exit sign in some state of disrepair. Dean Richard Bova, head of ResLife, says “we probably lose 75 or more” exit signs per year, “the bulk of them in Keeney.” Even if there’s no good way to know for certain what the motive was for each incident, let’s just say most well-adjusted human beings don’t run down the hall of Bronson 2nd floor clobbering every single exit sign with a broomstick on a Tuesday morning after drinking 14 cans of Fanta Grape. [Read more →]

Remember that first story you heard about your friend trying Four Loko? He/she bounced off the walls at a party for a few hours and then woke up the next Tuesday two towns over with no pants on, right? Remember when the government took away all the good Four Loko (the caffeinated kind) before you could get at it and replaced it with just some gross overly-sugared malted drink? You might now get to have your revenge.

Agwa.

Honestly, Agwa sounds like just about the most toxic liquid on the planet. According to its web site, it’s a liqueur distilled from the coca leaf with natural energy sources like guarana and ginseng. Now, if you know a little about illicit drug trafficking, you know that this same coca leaf is used to make COCAINE. I don’t know how else to explain this to you: AGWA IS EVERYTHING POWERTHIRST WISHES IT WERE. According to Agwa’s web site, Rudyard Kipling said coca alcohol was made “from the clippings and shavings of angel wings.”

Drink Agwa and you will look and feel like this.

Internetwines.com says Agwa has a “bittersweet peppery taste with an unusual effect.” I honestly don’t know what that means, but it glows green like absinthe and could probably power a Space Shuttle, so I’m excited to hear the first story of crazy escapades ensuing from a few shots of Agwa. At only $30 a handle, it costs as much as 3.5 liters of Karkov. It’s recommended that you drink Agwa with a lime. And a defibrillator. Good luck.

Note: I swear I have not touched Agwa. I cannot comment as to whether or not it’ll turn your urine that same hue of green.

Images via & via.

The label for Chateau Jiahu, one of the Dogfish Head brews available to sample at tonight's event

Who knew, in a world of Natty Light, Budweiser and PBR, that we have actually demonstrated an improvement in the area of beer making… in the last 10,000 years, that is.

Tonight, students, professors and community members alike piled into an auditorium to hear “Uncorking the Past,” a lecture about ancient beverages from the Director of the Penn Museum’s Biomolecular Archaeology Lab, Patrick McGovern, and to await their turn to sample recreations of the ancient brews made by Dogfish Head. When you say “free beer,” people come a’running. Literally every seat was filled.

McGovern’s work uses a combination of archaeology, ancient texts and art, and scientific experimentation to analyze vessels that once held food or drink to determine exactly what ancient peoples were eating and drinking. [Read more →]

Retro-style “Diamonds and Coal” from The Herald’s issue on September 17, 2004:

A diamond: “I have to say that until I started visiting Mr. Frank, I had never had Jägermeister or Grey Goose,” (formerly teetotaling President Ruth) Simmons said. “Since my first visit to him, I have become an avid consumer of both.”

Can’t get enough D&C? Read slightly more current incarnations in today’s Herald, or submit your own at www.DiamondsandCoal.com!

Looking to add a little bit of pizzazz to Obama’s State of the Union address tonight?  Thanks to our friends at NYU Local, we’ve got just the trick: a SOTU drinking game.  It’s pretty simple: take a drink every time that the President says “partisan,” “healthcare,” “economy,” “unemployment,” “coming together,” or “blood libel.”

This is when you would call Hangover Helpers

We’ve all been there. The splitting headache. The sea of red cups. The anonymous vomit in the corner. Last night you threw the wildest rager. But now its Sunday, and you’ve got to deal with a hangover and a destroyed post-party house. To some this might seem like a nightmare, but to a couple students at University of Colorado students, this was a business opportunity. Hangover Helpers, a student run business, brings fellow students and party-throwers breakfast burritos and Gatorade and will also clean up the party mess, all for a price of course — $15 per roommate. So, any students in Engineering and New Ventures, here’s a possible idea for a final!

They say that history is in the eyes of the beholder.  That couldn’t be more true with Drunk History, a series of YouTube videos in which incredibly drunk people recount important moments in history while famous actors act out their exact descriptions.  Watching a few of these videos gave us an idea: maybe we’ve been missing out on this “easy college experience” we’re all supposed to be having because we haven’t been drunk for most of it.   Before you immediately dismiss this proposition, we present to you our argument: the BlogDH’s list of four scholarly things that somehow become much easier while drunk.   [Read more →]

Is there nothing sacred left in life?  Phusion Projects announced yesterday that it would be removing caffeine, guarana, and taurine from all of its beverages, including–you guessed it–Four Loko.  Say goodbye to the wide-eyed-blackout-inducer we have come to know and love (although, yes, we realize that the we at the BlogDH must seem to like talking about it a little bit more than the average college students).

Oh well.  There’s always Red Bull.  Somehow it’s just not the same (there’s no alcohol in it…).

1. Washington State bans the crazy beverage. I guess all of you Seattle natives will have to stick to the old cup o’ Jo (Seattle’s Best perhaps?) over winter break.

2. Loko maker to halt shipments to NY State. Prediction: Brown students will care about legislation being passed in other states once it begins to infringe on our summer internship drinking habits.

3. Sen. John Tassoni plans to ban “blackout in a can” across all of RI. Those URI students just had to ruin the fun for all of us.

however, let us not forget…

4. Four Loko is still legal here in Connecticut’s Foreskin.  So drink up and get Loko!