How to Cuff the Hottie You Keep Seeing Around Campus

Look, I get it.

You’re hopelessly, irrevocably in love. Okay, sure, you’ve never actually spoken to them ─ that’s only a minor issue. After all, you’ve certainly seen them enough times to recognize the back of their head at a dimly-lit party, which is its own form of intimacy. At the end of the day, you know that your vibes align, you just need to figure out how to make the first move, and I’m here to help.

 

  1.       Do not, under any circumstances, try to speak to them.

At first glance, talking to the object of your affection might seem like a great idea. A simple self-introduction, a fact that relates the two of you (“Haven’t I seen you in my Beyonce: Herstory seminar?”), and a charming smile ─ what could go wrong? Everything. Everything could go wrong. Speaking to people needlessly puts you in a position of vulnerability. Opening yourself up to human connection at the risk of getting hurt? No, thank you. Instead, try silently staring at them from across the party. They’ll be sure to notice you, and they might even mention you to their friends!

 

  1.       Write a BBA about them.

Ah yes, the much more approachable relative of talking to your crush ─ writing them anonymous love letters. Though BBA (Brown Bears Admirers) has been defunct for a few months, rest easy knowing that BBA (Blueno Bears Admirers) provides a haven for all to deluge their lovestruck secrets. Though the seismic rebranding of BBA to BBA has caused a few followers to be lost in the process, some Brunonian is sure to tag your sweet. You can spend the rest of your day knowing that you’ve uplifted them and proceed to do absolutely nothing more. After all, you wrote the BBA. They should sense who you are and ask you on a date, not the other way around.

 

  1.       Make note of the places they frequent, and make sure that you’re there. Always.

Running into people is much less coincidental then you might have been led to believe. When it comes to your future spouse, it doesn’t make much sense to leave something so important up to cosmic luck. So, take your future into your own hands. Make a mental note of where you see them, whether that be local cafes, eateries, or libraries. Take a week of your time to really get acquainted with your lover’s second homes, spending at least seven hours in each place. The more time you spend sitting and waiting, the higher your chances of making awkward eye contact with your sweetheart when they come in. Scientific studies have shown that familiarity leads to love, so just make sure that you’re always within eyesight. They’ll have to say something at some point, even if they’re just asking to take the chair across from you.  

 

  1.       Tell all your friends about them in the hope that someone sets you two up.

Let’s be honest, “They were wearing a green sweater on Friday” is probably not a good enough description for your friends to immediately recognize your crush. However, nearly everyone is a Facebook Sherlock these days. I’m sure with a little determination and a hearty helping of elbow grease, your compatriots can make it happen. After all, what are best friends, casual friends, and distant acquaintances for? With Brown’s tight-knit and — at times — too small community, someone is sure to be able to link up the two of you. After that, it’s smooth sailing as your friend will no doubt arrange an elaborate blind date for the two of you.

 

  1.       Be yourself, if that’s what they’re into.

Imagine this ─ it’s a beautiful, crisp autumn day and you’ve done the unthinkable, you’ve introduced yourself to someone who was once just a beautiful stranger. Huzzah! You’ve thrown the hook, but how do you reel them in? The question might seem daunting, but the answer is simple: just be yourself, as long as they’re into that. You’re more than welcome to have your own hobbies, passions…  and interests on your own time, but if they’re not what your darling is interested in ─ drop your convictions immediately. A careful perusal of their Facebook and Instagram is sure to tell you what shows you should like, what foods you should be obsessed with, and the friend group that you should assimilate into. After initially drawing them in with your commonalities, you might even be able to slip in some of your real interests ─ just make sure not to do it too quickly.

 


Design Your Ideal Schedule and We’ll Tell You What You Should Be for Halloween


Get ’em while they’re hot! BlogDailyHerald shot glasses on sale

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Trying to find the perfect graduation gift for your favorite senior? Looking to celebrate the end of the year with new kitchenware? Want to support BlogDailyHerald while getting drunk? Then look no further!

For only $5 dollars, you can be the proud owner of your very own customized shot glass outfitted with our signature bear head logo. If you really want some, we have an even sweeter deal: if you buy 3, you get the fourth free! What better way to tell someone congratulations/thank you/you love them than with a custom BlogDailyHerald shot glass?

This week, you can find us in the Blue Room every day from 12:00 to 1:00 p.m, and from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m Friday. (We’ll also be updating our Facebook page with potential additional hours). You can us pay cash or send a Venmo payment.

If you’re not sold yet, here are some reasons why you should own a Blog shot glass:

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Apply to join Blog!

If you’re interested in writing, photography, videography, video editing, or graphic design and want to work with what may very well be the most fun group of creative virtuosos of the aforementioned fields on campus, then apply to Blog! If you’ve got something to say about anything from Buddy Cianci to Ratty food, why not publish it on a page where thousands of your peers can see it?

Blog is expanding and bigger than it’s ever been, so there’s no better time than now to get involved. Applications (accessible by clicking the link!) are due Wednesday, February 4th at 5 p.m. We will also be hosting an information session at the Brown Daily Herald office (195 Angell St.) on January 28th at 7 p.m. For more information, visit our Facebook event or contact us at blog@browndailyherald.com. We want you; apply to join today!

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Alternative Commencement: A blog for seniors, by seniors

Robert Redford

As the year winds down, it’s easy to get caught up in the chaos of finals and lose the opportunity to do some reflecting. For many of us, the end of the year marks the start of new summer adventures, but with the knowledge that we can once again return to College Hill. For others, however, this end means that their time here at Brown has come to a close. Whether this incites excitement, sadness, or uncertainty depends from person to person.

Despite what you feel, you now have the opportunity to share. Enter Alternative Commencement, a blog created by seniors Ana Olson  ’14 and Kayla Rosen ’14. Their blog allows Brown seniors to speak their mind and present what they would say if they could speak during commencement. The submissions can be poems, essays, or any other form of art. Basically, it is a completely open space for any senior to write whatever a senior wants, whether it’s about Brown, or just life in general. It’s a really cool opportunity for people to get their thoughts and emotions in writing before the end of the year comes around.

For more information, check out Alternative Commencement’s Facebook page, or read some of the submissions yourself on the blog. If you want to submit a piece of your own, email it to either kayla_rosen@brown.edu or ana_olson@brown.edu.

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The 12 Apps of Spring Weekend: Clearing your (study) schedule

The worst Spring Weekends are those when you have to work and/or study while you friends are slip ‘n’ sliding their way down Wriston…so GIT ER’ DUN.

With gFlash+ (Apple / Android), you have access to a huge bank of flashcards and you get to make your own in Google Docs. They sync wirelessly to your phone, so all you have to do is type in the question and answer and get learnin’. Although it’s not the best looking app, it’s by far the best free one!

Once you clear out next week’s studying, make sure you also study for exams the week after – there’s really nothing worse than trying to get yourself awake and out of bed after a full weekend of debauchery.

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