Hey y’all, it’s me, Cer Vix-a-lot. I’m taking over for Demisexual Lovato this week and I’m here to try to give y’all a crash course on female anatomy. As I’m sure a lot of you know, the sex education system in this nation is f***ed up, and a lot of people just have no idea what the hell is going on downstairs. My goal is to create a Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide to the Vagina. Let’s get started.
*Disclaimer: I’ll be throwing around words like “female” and “girl” a lot in this, but all this anatomy may not apply to transgender, intersex, or non-binary people. Remember: not all women have vaginas, and not all vaginas belong to women.*
In September 2013, a beautiful, 13 inch, 2.96 lb. MacBook Pro was bought into existence. I took care of it in its infancy as a proud Apple owner should — I shut off apps that weren’t in use, I used the power button to put it to sleep instead of simply closing it, I even traveled with it in a padded case. All efforts were proven to be for naught, however, when my 7 month old hard-drive crashed a week before finals.
It wasn’t until the crash that I realized how immensely dependent I am on my computer. When you lose all your documents, photos, and music, it feels like you’ve lost a lot more than files. Here’s how you can prevent losing everything, including your sanity, when you see this screen.
never good news
Cautionary tips: Some things to consider prior to the crash.
1. Back up everything, twice. If you’re like me and have an external hard-drive that you’re semi-faithful about backing up to, consider that external hard-drives can be more fragile than the drives in your computer. They’re a great thing to have, but ultimate safety is in the cloud. Get to know Dropbox and GoogleDrive really well.
2. Get Apple Care. The ability to call an Apple representative without additional costs should be incentive enough, but if it isn’t, consider how much money you will save on inevitable repairs. Apple Care costs between $79 and $99, whereas the cost of labor on a one-time repair is typically $95 at a minimum. That doesn’t include the cost of new hardware, which is also covered by Apple Care.