FlogDailyHerald: VDub fruit

I don’t think it’s controversial to say that the VDub is a better dining hall than the Ratty. While the lack of weekend hours can be a real bummer, most of the fare is of consistently higher quality than Ratty analogues. The bagels, for example, are massively superior at the VDub. I need not even mention the glory of Chicken Finger Friday, which consistently draws an enormous crowd. Unfortunately, all is not beautiful and pure there; something sticks out of the the rest of the scrumptious offerings, impinging upon the senses with its low quality. I speak, of course, of the fruit.

VW Apple

Lucifer’s going to have a hell of a job getting me to eat this one.

Green, brown, the occasional odd shade of orange. Most of the fruit at the VDub is stunted, sour, and inexplicably substandard. Where the fruit at the Ratty is usually high quality, the counterparts at the VDub at like some sort of twisted reflection of what fruit should be. Of all the fruit that gets put out, only the oranges and, on occasion, the bananas have been satisfactory on any consistent basis. I recall one halcyon day when there were actually good apples, visions of beauty that shall not come again.

Is this simply a matter of balance in the world? Must the rest of the VDub’s greatness come at this terrible price? No, I can’t accept this. I know it can do better. Is this like a sibling situation, where the VDub gets the hand-me-downs that the Ratty won’t use? Surely some of the Ratty’s golden apples could be spared for our favorite Pembroke dining hall.

Disappointing fruit is a terrible thing. Crisp, fresh fruit can be the factor that makes a breakfast worthwhile. I don’t see any reason why the VDub ought to languish in mediocrity. Whatever harvest deity watches over Pembroke needs to get of their lazy ass and do something about this.

Image via Steve Dowd ’15


Gourmet Heaven lives up to its name during soft opening

The wait is over; Gourmet Heaven opened its doors this morning at 9 a.m., and it truly is heavenly.

GH

While I would love to report that, like the diligent investigative journalist I aim to be, I was the first-ever customer at the brand-new College Hill branch of Gourmet Heaven, I only managed to snag (an admirable) third place. In my defense, the two students in front of me were coming off of an all-nighter, which I would call an unfair advantage.

A quick perusal of the aisles revealed an unapologetic collection of all the best bougie foods you could desire. I’m personally most excited about the coffee grounds selection, which includes highly covetable Sarabeth’s products. (For those of you unfamiliar with Sarabeth’s, it is a NYC restaurant that I once spotted Kelsey Grammer at. To be fair, I did admit it was all too bougie). The snack food options include tried-and-true favorites like Cape Cod Kettle Chips, and endearingly ‘alt’ brands with names like “Baked in Brooklyn” and “The Daily Crave” (with spoof newspaper packaging). Though I wish I could even attempt to fit a list of all of Gourmet Heaven’s offerings in a single post, some proper aisle-oogling will sure to be more efficient and more fun.

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