A Single’s Guide To Valentine’s Week

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Another year, another twelve months of emotionally detached partners and terrible dates and random makeouts in public parks at 1 a.m. because your roommates won’t let you bring in strangers you met on Grindr anymore.

Now, the big 14th day of the shortest month of year is approaching, and CVS is one big clusterfuck of pink and red and bears and chocolates. I’m perfectly bitter fine with being single on Valentine’s Day! If you are, welcome to the club! If you’re in a relationship, think about whether you want to marry the person you’re with because we’re at an age where that is highly plausible (like raising kids and attending funerals with them type of commitment)!

V-Day can be pretty depressing for us single phes. Here’s a guide to avoid that this week.

Get off the grid.

I’m not talking about going to the extremes like cutting up your credit cards and moving to a rural town in Wisconsin without cellular service. Just turn off Facebook for a week so you won’t have to see posts gushing about how someone can’t believe they’ve found The One in a sea of 6,000 undergraduates! What a selection pool!

Delete Instagram. You don’t need to know that a couple has chosen to stay in and watch Netflix as their Valentine’s Day date because you’re already doing that! But, alone!

I recommend keeping Venmo to see which couples go dutch on their dates and then start a betting pool with your single friends to see how long they’ll last. Then post your winnings on Venmo.

Take a day trip on your own!

You don’t have to go to New York or Boston. It can be as simple as a walk up Hope Street!

I suggest stopping by Seven Stars Bakery and reading television writer Kristin Newman’s book “What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding.” A single thirtysomething, Newman traveled the world during TV hiatuses and hooked up with Russian bartenders and Latin priests.

Take time and explore another city–or Providence for that matter–without having to bother holding someone’s sweaty hands in this ridiculous and never ending cold weather.

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RomCom Thursday: Love Actually

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In our BlogDH staff meeting last Sunday, David pitched that he’d be writing his RomCom Thursday post on Love Actually. The majority of our staff lit up with excitement, but Ana was skeptical, especially after having read David’s piece on When Harry Met Sally last week and vocally disagreeing with his concerns with the rom-com. As Ana expected, David went on to explain that he hated Love Actually. The two decided to duke it out and go head-to-head over Love Actually on the site for your reading pleasure. Enjoy. 

David: Any proper post-2009 discussion of Love Actually must begin by mentioning Valentine’s Day and New Year’s Eve, the American offspring of the UK box office success. These films, though perhaps less beloved, are peers to Love Actually in box office success (actually, V-Day was doubly more successful than the other two). And of course, the American movies ripped their entire structure and premise from Love Actually. But are they all that discernibly worse?

Certainly, I am not qualified to answer the question—I’ve seen neither Valentine’s Day nor New Year’s Eve. But I’m inclined to respond with another question—is it possible they could be that much worse? Because Love Actually is a slog. The Rotten Tomatoes consensus for Valentine’s Day—“Eager to please and stuffed with stars, Valentine’s Day squanders its promise with a frantic, episodic plot and an abundance of rom-com cliches”—could easily swap in “Love Actually” for “Valentine’s Day” and read just as well.

What does Love Actually actually offer that’s special? Continue Reading