Dear BlogDH Reader,

I’m not the biggest fan of February. It’s the short, weird month. It’s also the month that produces those annoying eight-year-olds who adamantly claim they’re only two years old. (Honestly, what the hell is February 29th?) The only thing I enjoy about February is that it’s the month of love. Although Valentine’s Day was two weeks ago, let us use the final day of the month celebrate love one last time. Instead of talking about romantic, filial, or family love, I want to honor the other types of “love”…after the jump. [Read more →]

Tinder? I barely know her. If you have not yet downloaded the app, you’ve probably seen its (omnipresent) ads. Perhaps you’ve even seen how two of our writers have enjoyed their own Tinder experiences. This remarkably addictive smartphone application has seen a meteoric spike in popularity on campuses all over the nation. Why? Before answering this question, you should first have a basic understanding of how Tinder works.

Now let us unpack the main components of Tinder’s success: [Read more →]

It’s here, Brunonia: That day that makes you feel, depending on your relationship status, either more self-conscious or more hot-and-bothered than when your calculus TA checked you out at SexPowerGod.

For you lucky ones who have found that significant other at Brown, V-Day is a lot of pressure. What could you possibly do to show your loved one that there’s no one you’d rather be spending the big day with besides your Neopet Chomby? Chocolates are classic, but it will be obvious you got them with flex points at Little Jo’s. And if you’re broke and blew all your points on Spindrifts in the first week, that Valentine’s Day dinner will be less romantic on meal credits at the Ratty. But don’t worry, I have the perfect solution for you struggling souls. I’ve put together a love poem that describes just how deep your love goes, Brown style, with a lot of a little help from RhymeZone.com. I guarantee that if you read your loved one this poem, while standing on top of the bear statue on the Main Green accompanied by an a capella group, you will end up getting married (well, there’s a 60% chance if you both live in Perkins). Interpretive dance moves encouraged—maybe get some tips from the Poler Bears. Go out there and spread the Brunonian love.

You’re spicier than a Jo’s Spicy With
And classier than a Darwin’s fifth
You’re sweeter than V-Dub soft serve
And ENGN9′s grading curve
You’re sexier than SexPowerGod
And streaking across Wriston Quad
You’re more entertaining than the Blue Room on Sundays
Watching hungover chicks drink double shot lattés
You’re more distinct than an S with distinction
And watching a Bruno sports team win
You’re better than free Kabob & Curry
And getting first pick in the housing lottery
You’re wilder than the SciLi challenge
And the end-of-semester flex point binge
You’re chiller than the BroPo on 4/20
And Spring Weekend day-drinking when it’s finally sunny
You’re classier than that Thayer street walk of shame
The morning after Whisko can’t remember his name
You’re crazier than all this shit that goes down
You’re better than the best of Brown.

If that doesn’t get your loved one climbing the bear statue to be with you, I don’t know what will. Feel free to add your own verses based on inside jokes and experiences, like “You’re hotter than when we did it on the Sayles organ / And sorry for that time I yelled ‘Oh, Piers Morgan!’”

Love is in the (virtual) air

I think we can all agree that Valentine’s Day is usually much more depressing than it is enjoyable. When you’re a kid, you’re sad because that girl with the blonde hair and 10 Tamagotchis got more cards with Spongebob or puppies on them than you. As an adult, you’re in a relationship and experiencing some sort of a crisis about whether or not you should be together. It goes something like this:

• Does he really not believe in commercial holidays or does he not respect me enough to celebrate with me? And do I really want to date the pretentious cheapskate who doesn’t believe in commercial holidays?

Or like this:

• Does he really think that a V-Dub cupcake is a substantial gift?

Or you’re horribly, horribly alone.

Maybe that’s just me. But it’s universally acknowledged that February 14th can lead to pretty nasty feelings. Perhaps one of the worst situations to be in on Valentine’s Day is in a long-distance relationship. LDRs are tragically common among college-goers and if you, like many, will not be with your significant other this Hallmark holiday season, never fear! Blog is here to give you some suggestions on how to make this Valentine’s Day less lonely:

[Read more →]

Hello, readers!  It’s good to be back. After succumbing to Mono this winter break, I’ve had a lot of time to watch movies, go through multiple TV series, read some weird self-help dating books, and bake. I basically became an old spinster over break.  Pathetic? Slightly, but you try having Mono over Christmas.

At home, I met up with old friends and heard about their escapades, problems, and new boyfriends. In fact, I spent one evening listening to my friend drone on endlessly about her beau who almost told her he loved her. Ew. The only thing preventing me from gauging my eyes out with my fork was the chocolate cake that was on its way. Another friend was engaging in a “Friends with Benefits” type thing but secretly wanted more. As I listened to their relationship problems, I reveled in the fact that I had none of my own. I was single and free and boy, it felt good. [Read more →]

Try to think back to your middle school years. Among the several airbrushed sweatshirts, Black Eyed Peas hits, and rounds on rounds of Icy Tower, there was was the all-knowing and infallible Love Calculator that would help you determine the likelihood that you and your crush (<3) would end up ~together 4ever.~ You’d type in your name and that of your “dream partner” and the website would hurl a random percentage right back at your face; yet you were unsatisfied that despite your 3 8 17 entries that day, your crush would never be informed of your feelings for him/her.

Fast-forward to 2013: Facebook is probably the center of your (online) universe, and your cupid-like peers have drastically changed the love game. Enter “Brown Admirers,” a Facebook page through which you can submit a light-hearted message to a crush or individual you’ve been admiring from afar in the form of a Google Doc. The page’s administrators then post your submission on its timeline and tag the person to whom the message was directed. You can submit the message anonymously or with your name, or you can even include little clues to help them determine who the sender is. In other words, your crush will definitely get the message but the extent to which you reveal yourself to him/her is completely in your hands.  [Read more →]

If you’re at all like me, then the only good part of Valentine’s Day is all the chocolate that goes on sale February 15^th. Whether you’re happily single or forever alone, Valentine’s Day is essentially a holiday created to remind you of something you don’t have. For some reason, everything becomes more disgusting on Valentine’s Day: I may own a closetful of hot pink and I may love romantic comedies, but on Valentine’s Day, they each make me want to vomit.

It’s easiest to avoid the Valentine’s Day blues if you’ve got single friends with whom to spend the day, but we can’t all be so lucky. You can’t really have a girls’ night with only one girl. So what should you do to occupy your time? Well, there’s always the SciLi, but if the idea of actually being productive through your wallowing doesn’t appeal to you, we’ve got some ideas for a Valentine’s Day all by your lonesome.

[Read more →]

Ah, Saint Valentine, thank you for all you have given us. What would we do without red-foil-wrapped Hershey’s Kisses and poorly written Hallmark cards? Okay okay, I’m not one to be cynical about love and romance, but sometimes it’s hard not to feel a little left out when Starbucks cups and movie night advertisements in the SciLi continuously remind me that I’m (insert cough and awkward eye-contact deflection here) single.

Fortunately for me (and for all of us in college), I cannot complain about the lack of love in my life when my friends and the people I adore most in the world constantly surround me (seriously, I feel like I’m participating in a year-long sleepover with my roommates and I could not be happier). So, to show my roommates how much I love them and how much they mean to me (#sappy), I decided to celebrate Valentine’s Day with a baked treat: red velvet cake. [Read more →]

Once upon a time, a beautiful maiden-slash-lodge-owner named Ruth Wakefield made a dire mistake.  While preparing some cookies for her guests at the Toll House Inn, she ran out of baking chocolate.  All in a tizzy, Ms. Wakefield chopped and dropped a gift from Mr. Andrew Nestle of the Nestle Chocolate Company, a semi-sweet chocolate bar.  Unfortunately for her beloved Butter Drop Do cookies, the chocolate did not melt and disperse evenly.  Fortunately for lovers of chocolate chip cookies everywhere, the broken chocolate morsels softened in the dough and a new cookie was born.  Thanks, Ms. Wakefield!  Your blunder has spread love, joy and sometimes Salmonella across the nation, and other countries wish they were as cool as us for thinking of it first.

I’m going to let you in on a (not-so-secret) secret: people like cookies. It should also go without saying that people don’t like cookie dough; they LOVE cookie dough.  In fact, one might argue that half (or more than half) of the reason for making cookies is so one can eat the raw dough.  That’s a thing, right?  Anyone?  Anyone?  Bueller?  [Read more →]

Good news for all you romantics out there! The New York Times is hosting its second Modern Love college essay contest, which means it wants to give you $1000 big ones for your take on what the four-letter-word means to our generation. The editor of the column had this to say about the last contest, in 2008:

When the contest deadline passed seven weeks later, more than 1,200 essays had arrived, from 365 schools in 46 states and Puerto Rico. In perhaps typical collegiate fashion, nearly 700 poured in on the last day, 400 over the final hour. [Read more →]