Here’s our very own Brown University Auto-Complimenter

During one of my scroll sessions through the Brown University Compliments page (presented by BlogDailyHerald), getting my daily fix of insane jealousy the warm-and-fuzzies, I noticed something a little weird. After reading a few dozen compliments, the words “beautiful,” “life,” “caring,” and “kind” basically meant nothing to me anymore. It was kind of freaky. But I kept scrolling. To my amazement, I couldn’t find a single compliment that didn’t use at least one of about ten select words.

So, like any rational person, my first thought was to verify my somewhat biased findings by downloading every single compliment ever posted on the page, as well as a few classic novels from Project Gutenberg, and running some stats on them. Here’s what I found (click on the image below to enlarge):

word_incidence_rate_per_word

So apparently, compliments on the page use “life” and “lives” more often than Mary Shelley did when she wrote a book about the creation of life. Next, the number of characters per word in the same texts (click on the image below to enlarge):

cpw

No comment on this one, except that if you send me a compliment, it better have an average of at least 15 characters per word.

Anyway, these stats revealed to me the magical formula for writing the best compliments ever. And now you, too, can give someone the most amazingly beautiful and genuinely passionate compliment without even having to think about it! Just hit the button below and copy-pasta to your heart’s delight.