Brown Motion Pictures: Fall premiere


Brown Motion Pictures (BMP) hosted its fall premiere last night at the Avon Cinema. The event debuted the four student-led films that BMP produced this semester to a packed house. BMP members, Brown students, and people from the Providence community were all stylishly dressed as they checked their name off the ticket list and made their way to their seats. The smell of popcorn filled the lobby, where attendees were getting their pictures taken by event photographers.

The first film screened was Parkour! directed and written by Jenn Maley ‘16.

This hilarious mockumentary about the making of a parkour film will have you as out of breath as doing actual parkour. Brian Semel ‘16 is brilliant as Michael (an ode to Michael Scott, perhaps?)

See it for: If you have been missing The Office or Parks and Recreation, then this is a film you won’t want to miss! Also, bagels (you’ll get the reference when you see it).

The second film was Man In Suit directed by Errol Danehy ‘18 and written by Aubrie Redwine ‘18.

A more action-based comedy, Man In Suit takes a look at art imitating life and vice versa when an unlikely hero (Ben Silver ‘17) finds his own internal power via comic book.

See it for: Really cool film noir style flashbacks and music. Also shots of The Underground as a speakeasy-esque bar that will totally shock you.

The film was followed by circles directed by Marcus Sudac ‘17 and written by Kent Smith ‘16.

Continue Reading

Before The Force Awakens

If you’ve been living in a cave for the past few years, you might not know about the upcoming Star Wars film [Ed note: much love to the cave dwellers among us]. Even if you have been living in a cave though, chances are you still heard the excited shrieks of fanatics everywhere when they first learned the news.  After months and months of anticipation, the time is finally upon us– Star Wars: The Force Awakens hits theaters nationwide on December 17. The film has been under lock and key since its inception (thankfully, Sony wasn’t involved in this production), so very little is known as we begin the countdown to opening day.  Here’s what we do know:

Name: The Force Awakens



Director: J.J. Abrams

Veteran director, producer, and self-proclaimed Star Wars fanatic, J.J. Abrams is at the helm of this chapter of the Star Wars saga; Countless interviews show him proclaiming his undying loyalty to the franchise and earnestly professing his efforts to stay true to the originals.  Fandom aside, he has quite the resume, from Mission Impossible III to Lost to, more controversially, Star Trek (the reboot).  Naturally, some die hard Star Wars fans fear a trekkie influence on their beloved franchise; they should know better than anyone though– as Yoda so sagely put it— fear is the path to the dark side.

Continue Reading

Your favorite Halloween flicks re-imagined at Brown

What would happen if the movies you love to watch during Halloweek took place here on campus? We’d get some spooky results.

WARNING: Some of this content may not be suitable for children (or for the more fragile members of the student body). Please note that the following scenarios do not reflect the reality of the Brown experience. I should also add a SPOILER ALERT for any of the following movies.

  1. creepy hallwayThe Brown Witch Project: A group of three friends, after hearing rumors of a party, decide to venture into Grad Center. They gradually realize that they can’t find the party OR the way out. One of them decides to film their endeavors as the students become more and more distraught. After days of wandering the concrete, riot-proof hallways, they think they hear EDM coming from someone’s room. They enter, and never come back. A few days later, a phone is found with the video evidence and released to the student body.
  2. the villageThe Village as The Bubble: The entire Brown community is terrified of leaving College Hill, believing that terrible monsters live outside the Brown bubble. In the end, the horror stories turn out to be a conspiracy, and all that exists outside the bubble is some delicious food and a working train system that will take you to Boston for $10.
  3. silver statueChucky as The Circle Dance. What if those funny aluminum people could come to life and wreak havoc across campus? Actually, that’s terrifying. Let’s move on to something lighter.
  4. unnamed
    “It’s the Great Paxson, Charlie Brown!”:
    This piece would chronicle the Halloween of two Brunonian friends. Let’s call this dynamic duo Linus and Charlie. Linus is convinced that if the two camp out all night on the Main Green, Christina Paxson will appear in genie form and grant them wishes. Specifically, he plans to ask for a return of the Ivy Room Mac and Cheese. Charlie–although he’s reluctant about missing all of Brown’s Halloween festivities (aka Ultra), and thinks his friend might be a bit unhinged–decides to suck it up and stick with Linus anyway. The two end up falling asleep and DPS wakes them up first thing in the morning, concerned that they may have gotten too turnt the night before.
  5. shining twinsThe Shining: This classic would take place in Minden, which used to be an old hotel. It really is the perfect set. Picture your favorite campus doppelgangers chilling in the hallway as the creepy twins.
  6. beetlejuice

    He’s the ghost of Fishco, am I right?

    Beetlejuice as Fishcojuice: Two freshman fear that they don’t know how to “do college” very well. By saying “Fishcojuice” three times in a row, they summon the ghost of Fischco to help them. Picture Christina Paxson doing this at the Ratty.                         

  7. The Silence of the Lambs: On second thought, even from a purely theoretical standpoint, I don’t want this movie to have anything to do with our campus. Ever. This is how I feel just thinking about it:van der meme yikes
  8. A Brunonian’s Sixth Sense— “I see dead Keeney.”: A freshman is somehow able to see and interact with all the things on Brown campus that have been eliminated over the years: the Gate, the old version of Keeney where you can freely walk the hallways between Jameson, Archibald, and Everett, even Tedeschi‘s. He looks to an older student for guidance, and in the end (PLOT TWIST) it turns out that the student was actually an alum in denial about the fact that he had graduated.

sixth sense

Images via, via, via, via, via, via, via and via.

Blogify: Back to the Future


Great Scott! For those of you who haven’t checked your calendar, today is October, 21, 2015 — today is the day that Marty McFly visits the future! To channel our inner sense of time traveling adventure, we’ve compiled a playlist with songs that quite literally travel through the years. Take a moment to think about the fact that after 4:29 p.m. today, all of Back to the Future will be in the past. UGH.

Image via.

A real Martian reviews “The Martian”


Above: not a Martian

I mean, where do I even begin? You all have been pretty nosy this week, what with the finding water last Monday. And NASA releasing all those pictures! I mean some solitude would be nice, really. Just because you all like looking your house up on Google Earth doesn’t mean you get to involve other planets in your sick voyeurism. We didn’t ask to be number one at the box office this weekend. We are a species which values privacy, and if you can’t give us that, at the very least, accuracy please.

First of all, Matt Damon is not a Martian. He just isn’t. Being on Mars does not make you a Martian any more than visiting China makes you Chinese. And if you want to call Mars a, “hostile environment”, maybe stop trying to sell planetary colonization efforts to the public (cough cough NASA/SpaceX/MarsOne). No one is making you come. No one is making you stay.

That said, the performances were pretty good. I would listen to Jessica Chastain tell me to do anything. Donald Glover and Kristen Wiig actually killed the high budget drama. Although, I’m not entirely sure I count this as a drama. Matt Damon did say the words, “I’m going to have to science the shit out of this”, so let’s take the category of drama with a grain of salt. Who wrote this thing? He also talks to his plants a lot.

Continue Reading

“Sisterhood of the Night” brings spooky social critique to Ivy Film Festival


I know enough about movies to say that this was a really important scene.

There’s nothing like attending a film festival to remind you that you know absolutely nothing about cinema. That was the first thought I had as I took my seat for the Ivy Film Festival’s screening of “Sisterhood of the Night.”

It turned out to be an incredible film, my cinematic ignorance notwithstanding. The premise is that of a modern-day Salem witch trial that grips a sleepy suburban town. A group of girls form a secretive cult called The Sisterhood of the Night, and allegations soon surface that the girls are sexually abusing their recruits. But the girls won’t say anything, because they’ve taken a vow of silence.

The scandal balloons as parents and the local media become involved and misinterpret everything. As it turns out, the Sisterhood’s intent is entirely harmless: The girls are just sharing their secrets and insecurities with each other in a world that doesn’t listen to teenage girls.

The film is beautiful and spooky, with lots of ethereal nighttime scenes of the girls running around through the darkness. The film plays off clichéd high school drama in way that’s both funny and self-aware. The characters are lovable, and the quiet suburban setting gives the whole film a slightly dystopian feel.

All in all I really liked it, but I don’t know shit about movies, so take that with a grain of salt.

Image via