Overwrought BBA Posts Part 2

#696969

Hey Perkins girl,

I know it’s been a while since we last spoke. You said that it wouldn’t work because you’re so busy, but I just know that if I lived closer you’d find time for me. I’m trying to convince your roommate to file a housing change form so I can be with you- please convince her? I know it’ll be worth it.

-Pembroke boy

 

#700000

@696969- SO YOU’RE THE CREEP WHO’S BEEN LEAVING THREATS OUTSIDE OUR DOOR?!? I HOPE YOU STEP ON THE PEMBROKE SEAL. My roommate had a nervous breakdown because of you. I’m getting a restraining order.

Also, when I said I was busy, I meant I wasn’t interested. Take a hint.

 

#700010

Update: Your roommate dropped out, so I convinced your house to take me in so there would be no vacancies. We can finally be together!!!!!!!

 

#700023-

Today the girl I loved broke my heart. I write this letter from Barus & Holley, the only labyrinth desolate enough to house the remnants of my heart. I thought the distance between us was our biggest problem, but no physical distance (like not even Pembroke-Perkins) could overcome the distance in your eyes. I hope that someday, years down the line, when the restraining order expires, you’ll see the folly of your ways. I’ll love you forever.

 

#700033-

 This post was flagged due to explicit content.


Overwrought BBA Posts Part 1

42069- To that girl in the Sci-Li in the pineapple costume on Halloween in 2014:

I was the boy wearing the pizza costume, and I think that says it all. It was love at first sight. The green foliage you wore on your head was what first attracted my attention. From there, it only got better. It’s been four years, and I still can’t stop thinking about you. I would say please notice me, but I know you noticed me looking before you glanced away quickly. Too quickly… and still, your brown eyes haunt my every dream. And whenever I do get to see them again, it really piques my pepperoni… if you know what I mean.

We have mutual friends, but I don’t think we’ve ever hung out. I know you called me crusty, and told your friends you’re not interested… but I just wish you’d give me a chance. Every time I see you with another girl or guy, I die a little bit on the inside. My sun rises and sets with you. You’re the single most beautiful person/pineapple I’ve ever seen. All I’m asking for is a chance. Continue Reading


Post- Magazine’s Spring Weekend guide

Post- Magazine’s Spring Weekend guide hits newsstands today. In addition to our usual artist profiles, you’ll find features on BCA and roaming freshmen, a binge-drinking-themed board game, an interview with Dave Binder (who doesn’t like our binge drinking as much as we thought), and a guide to staying classy (and/or trashy) from Thursday to Sunday. Copies will be available at the Ratty, Faunce, J. Walter Wilson, and other locations around campus. After the jump, an excerpt from “Spring Weekend Memories.” Continue Reading


Post- Editors’ Top 10: Ways we wish the BCA had announced the Spring Weekend lineup

  1. Tableslips.
  2. Elephants.
  3. Rename the Blue Room muffins.
  4. Another, smaller concert.
  5. “_____ is racist.”
  6. CRIME ALERT: CONCERT LINEUP.
  7. State of Brown address.
  8. Morning Mail! … oh, awkward.
  9. Skywriting.
  10. Gail.

Check out this week’s Post- for drunken grocery shopping; mad, mad men; and an exclusive interview with Thought Catalog writer and aggressive tweeter Ryan O’Connell.

Post- magazine comes out on Thursdays inside the BDH. Copies are also available in the Ratty, Faunce, J Walter Wilson, and other locations throughout the week.


Post- Editors’ Top 10: Things Christina Paxson was hiding under her scarf

1.     Prison tat.
2.     An eating club.
3.     Katherine Bergeron.
4.     Ratty cup.
5.     Secret Crystal of the Tall People.
6.     Another, smaller scarf.
7.     F*cking cocaine.
8.     Spring Weekend lineup.
9.     A bust … of Woodrow Wilson.
10.  Stilts.

Check out this week’s Post- for bad puns, the virtues of Go, post-show depression, some thoughts on Spotify, and more information than you’d ever need about the Pussyphone.

Post- magazine comes out on Thursdays inside the BDH. Additional copies are available in the Ratty, Faunce, J Walter Wilson, and other locations throughout the week.


Post- Editors’ Top 10: Things we don’t like about Providence

TOP 10 Things We Don’t Like About Providence

  1. Rain.
  2. Tedeschi.
  3. Parking.
  4. Masturbators in Julia and Kristina’s backyard.
  5. Not Boston, New York, Paris, Florence, et. al.
  6. Daily armed robberies.
  7. F*cking cocaine.
  8. No booze between 2 and 6 a.m.
  9. F*cking cyclers.
  10. No mo’ FishCo.

Despite the theme of this week’s Top 10, Post- actually likes Providence—so much that we’ve devoted an entire issue to it. Check out our “Best of Providence” issue for our local favorites: bars, coffee shops, bands, museums, desserts, BYOB restaurants, liquor stores, and much more. And if you’re really looking for the local experience, check out our top five Providence places to get down on the back page.

Post- magazine comes out on Thursdays inside the BDH. Additional copies are available in the Ratty, Faunce, J Walter Wilson, and other locations throughout the week.