Andrews Problems: Trouble in paradise


Don’t be fooled. It’s a hellhole.

Andrews residence hall is widely considered to be the best dorm on campus. Since its recent renovation, the name Andrews has become synonymous with beauty and luxury. Many people, especially the Keeney kids, call it “Hotel Andrews.”

But what is life really like in those new and spacious rooms? Are the chandeliers in the Dining Commons real? What demons lurk in the shadows of those walk-in closets? Blog has gained access to my personal journal the journal of an anonymous Andrews resident that gives us a rare glimpse into the struggles of life beyond the veranda.

August 30th

Dear journal,

When I arrived at Brown this morning, I was like so many other starry-eyed freshmen. I was filled with conflicting emotions: Excitement, wonder, a little trepidation. I checked in and was given my key and swipe card. They told me I’d be living in Andrews. “You’ll love it,” they said. “It’s been recently renovated.”

Oh, how naive I was.

As soon as I stepped into my room I knew my life was about to change forever. The comforts of home were gone, my family was about to leave me, I’d be forced to live independently.

But worst of all, the rug I brought was nowhere near large enough to cover the expanse of floor that stretched out before me as free and unbounded as the Great Plains.

September 3rd

Dear journal,

I don’t know how I’ve made it these last few days. Never have I felt so much self-doubt. There’s so much pressure to make friends, choose the right classes, etc. Shopping period has been totally overwhelming.

Today, I got back to my room exhausted and emotionally drained after another day of shopping both classes and friend groups. I wanted to wash my face, but the underwhelming water pressure in my personal sink was the last straw. I just broke down and sobbed.

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