Fall@Brown: Haunted House Lineup


Growing up in the Philadelphia suburbs, I pride myself on having averaged a good six to eight haunted house visits each Halloween season. Whether it was clowns, skeletons, or the ridiculous cost of admission, I traveled to abandoned asylums, run-down prisons, and revamped cornfields all with the intention of crying like a baby being terrified. Well, October is here, and if you’ve got the haunted house bug, here’s the lineup of Rhode Island haunted houses to remind that there are things scarier than CS:

Fear Town

Seekonk Speedway 1710 Fall River Ave., Seekonk, MA 02771

  • The Gist: Fear Town is an outdoor haunted path located in the woods by Seekonk Speedway that takes you through abandoned buildings and across uneven forest terrain.
  • Distance from Campus: 7.3 miles
  • Cost: $16
  • Estimated Uber Fare: $9-12
  • Horror Tropes Used: The woods, abandoned buildings.
  • Bonus: Fear Town boasts the highest Yelp rating (4.8 stars) in RI and the lowest cost/Uber fare, meaning this one is mostly likely to be your budget’s favorite attraction.

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Concert Knowledge: 7 things I learned at Bo Burnham’s MAKE HAPPY tour


Bo Burnham came to Providence Friday night, for the third stop of his Fall 2015 MAKE HAPPY tour. Burnham is a comedian, musician, and writer. Starting out of YouTube at the age 16, Burnham was the youngest comedian to record a Comedy Central special at the age of 18. He’s recorded two hour-long specials since then – Words, Words, Words in 2010 and what. in 2013. Burnham also wrote and starred in the MTV series Zach Stone is Gonna Be Famous, is hilarious on Vine, and wrote a bestselling poetry book, EGGHEAD.

Burnham performed Friday night at the gorgeous VETS auditorium, and he killed it. Here are the 7 things I learned at MAKE HAPPY 2015:

1. WolfCop is a must (?) see

Burnham’s opener, Adam Newman from Comedy Central, gave a hilarious raving review/reenactment of WolfCop, a Sharknado-esque 2014 movie on Netflix that’s fairly self-explanatory (read: werewolf and cop). However, as Newmann animatedly described, this werewolf movie is the only one where the protagonist transforms into a werewolf wiener-first. WolfCop (aka Lou Garou) transforms into a werewolf mid-pee, and the transformation is a progression of approximately “wiener to potato to explosion.” My friend and I started watching it after the show, and it’s definitely, as Newman argued, a must see. The Netflix description: “After being transformed into a werewolf, a boozy cop uses his new powers to tangle with devil worshipers, shape-shifters, and other minions of evil.” I mean…

2. Bo is tall, so very tall (and also very fluid)

Yes, Bo is ridiculously crazy tall in person, a friend you’d definitely want to take apple picking. At 6′ 5″, Bo was easy to see on stage, sporting his signature white T. The man is just a lot of limbs and is also a very animated performer and dancer. His long legs and arms form a whirlwind of Bo, a fluid octopus of comedy, dance, and sound, if you will.

3. Straight white men have a lot of problems

Bo sat down at his piano and prefaced a song with, “I have a lot of problems, and I like to share them with people,” beginning a satirical, self-aware song from the perspective of a straight white man. Bo belted out a drawn out and melodic, “Straiiiightttt whiteeeeeeee mannnnnn” chorus throughout the song, singing, “Can’t you just leave us alone, and also, no, to the things you asked for” to all the gays and the women’s rights activists.

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Fall@Brown: Orchard Living

Apple Orchard

Campus life getting you down? Checked off everything on your back to campus guide-to-the-outside? With the hustle and bustle of a big city like Providence paired with so many trees and not enough apples on the Main Green, you might just be in need of a relaxing fall day. As luck would have it, Rhode Island is perfect for the quintessential fall outing: apple-picking. Check out these orchards, all within fifteen miles of Brown’s campus.

Dame Farm 91-B Brown Avenue, Johnston, RI 02919

  • Distance from campus: 10.3 miles
  • Besides apple-picking, buy blueberries, peaches, pears, plums, and assorted veggies (unlike apples, these aren’t pick-your-own).
  • By RIPTA: Take the 10X from Weybosset Post Office to Hartford FS Brown, plus about 1.6 mi walking total.
  • Estimated Uber fare: $12-17

Pippin Orchard 751 Pippin Orchard Road, Cranston, RI 02921

  • Distance from campus: 11.6 miles
  • Besides apple-picking, buy fruits, vegetables, maple syrup, honey, and assorted baked goods.
  • By RIPTA: Take the 19 from the Providence bus stop (the large terminal on Washington St.) to Amflex NS Comstock, plus about 2.3 mi walking total.
  • Estimated Uber fare: $13-18

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Where to observe National Lobster Day in Providence

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In early August, the U.S. Senate shelled out a few hours to approve a resolution that marked September 25th, 2015 as “National Lobster Day,” inspiring headlines like, “US Senate Gets Cracking & Passes National Lobster Day Bill.” If only our founding fathers could see us now, dedicating a day to the crustacean that was once in such abundance, it was deemed the underwater equivalent of a rat! (Following the recent glorification of Pizza Rat, you can expect to see the Senate approve a National Subway Rat Day in 2016.)

Since you probably missed the Maine Lobster Festival in late July (yeah, the one David Foster Wallace wrote about in his essay “Consider The Lobster“), and you probably gave up on the Shuckin Truck line at the Rhode Island Seafood Festival a few weeks ago, this is your chance to savor the last taste/chewy consistency of summer while engaging in a Senate-approved activity! Here’s a run-down of where to make your reservations or takeout plans to get your lobster fix this Friday:


Yes, National Lobster day is technically on Friday. But certainly the most cost-friendly option is to kick off your celebration early and head down to Captain Seaweed’s tonight. Every Thursday, this beloved pub (located on the corner of Ives and Williams) gives out raffle tickets with every drink ordered, announcing the winner of a free tray with two lobsters and a bag of mussels at the end of the night. Our tips for winning and then how to cook your winnings can be found here.

2. Yoo

This isn’t my first time at the rodeo, so believe me when I say Yoo is the best sushi I’ve ever had in Providence. And, they deliver! (Important because no one I know has ever been to the physical establishment.) Yoo makes a Super Lobster Roll with lobster tempura, mango, avocado and soybean wrapped in seaweed. I admire any dish that sounds like it’s going to come in a buttered bun but is instead mostly composed of sticky rice.

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What Lincoln Chafee brings to the 2016 Presidential race


Yesterday in Wilson 101, former Governor and Senator of Rhode Island Lincoln Chafee ‘75 P’ 14 P ’17, in a partnership with the Brown Journal of World Affairs, participated in a Q&A on various national and international issues. This comes right on the tail of Chafee basically announcing that he was running for President of the United States, and offered ample opportunity for participants to get an early understanding of his agenda and positions on key topics in the upcoming race.

With Hillary Clinton dominating the democratic nomination conversation, it can be hard to understand why other Democrats would even bother. Yet, as Chafee said himself, “There shouldn’t be one person out there…voters want options.” Chafee would certainly be a very different candidate from Clinton.

Here is what Lincoln Chafee could bring to the presidential race:

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2014 Rhode Island election results

As Election Day comes to a close, the state’s democrats have some celebrating to do. The party’s candidates saw victories in all major state and federal positions, including the much-publicized race for mayor of Providence. Here are some of the results.

Mayor of Providence 

Jorge Elorza (D)


Elorza, the 37-year-old judge and law professor, beat out two time mayor and ex-con, Buddy Cianci, winning 53% of the vote.

Governor of Rhode Island

Gina Raimondo (D)


Raimondo, who beat out Cranston mayor Allen Fung (R) by three points, has been State General Treasurer since 2010. She is also a well-respected venture capitalist and lawyer. As the mother of two, her campaign emphasizes that her platforms aim to put families first. She also plans to create jobs by funding tourism, infrastructure, manufacturing, student internships and small business startups. Raimondo holds degrees from Harvard (B.A.), Yale (J.D.) and Oxford (NBD).

House of Representatives 

RI District 1: David Cicilline (D)

RI District 2: Jim Langevin (D)

Both incumbent House representatives took the win, beating their opponents by around 20% each.


With 70% of the vote Democratic incumbent, Jack Reed will continue to represent the people of RI in the U.S. Senate.

Images via and via.