Senior Week schedule released

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Class Coordinating Board 2015 has released the details on this year’s Senior Week. Freshmen, sophomores, and juniors, take a look at all the fun that awaits you in the oh-so-distant future. Seniors, feast your eyes on the schedule for the last week of your Brown careers, and contemplate your impending mortality:

Friday, May 15

Commencement Kickoff: Pick up your cap and gown and the bracelets you need for all future Senior Week events.

Movie Night: Toy Story 3 + beer garden + snacks = pure happiness.

Saturday, May 16

Unit Wars: Will “Best Unit” Champlin knock off freshman year champs Wayland? Only one way to find out.

Time Capsule Reception: I’m not sure which is more terrifying: that our 25th reunion is in 2040, or the prospect of how much weird stuff is going to be in this time capsule.

Last Chance Disorientation Dance: Turns out CCB likes to facilitate Senior Scramble moves. Per the site’s description of the dance:

Through an anonymous online matching system, submit up to 7 seniors with whom you have always wanted a “last chance.” Then, on the night of the dance, receive an email notification of any matches (if you put someone who has also put you).

Yay for Brown ’15 Tinder! Oh, and it’s neon-themed.

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Senior Week Musings: No one is over easy

“There can’t be any question: Things are weird,” Keenan says, nursing a battered roach. He lets a white cloud out of his mouth.

“And you know, it’s not like things will be better next Tuesday at 3:45 a.m. Next Tuesday is the day before Wednesday, which is when I have to contribute to society, and I can’t decide that Wednesday is my day and just ditch everything, drink beer,” I say.

Keenan sort of salutes me. I open my mouth to say something else, but then greet it instead with a pathetic nibble of cancer mixed with cannabis. I cough the word Yeah and it’s all I can muster; I talk too much.

It’s been a hard night out. I and the rest of the hooligans have come back home during the Dead Zone, the time between 2 a.m. and 5 a.m. when everyone knows that he or she is fucked for slakin’ that hankerin’ for a bite.

I start cracking eggs. Keenan lets a white cloud out of his mouth; he’s rolled another one. “I don’t know, man, it doesn’t sound, you know, likely. Well, for you, anyway.”

“Fuck off.”

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