Time-waster of the day: April 12, 2012

Picture the scene.

Setting: a NYC subway car. The antagonists: an angry man and an angry woman. They kick each other. Words are screamed. Passengers swoon in fear. Only one man has the courage to step up and — oh, wait, never mind, he’s just eating chips.

Hey… that’s right. He’s just eating chips.

In a brilliant display of potato-based diplomacy, a young man pops out of nowhere and simply stands between the two rivals, absorbed in his munching, reducing high tempers to smoldering ruin. This man is a bringer of peace and a chewer of chips. Send him to Washington post-haste!

They call him “Snackman.” He’s the hero we deserve.

Also, he’s from North Kingstown. No big deal. #RIswaggin