Dear Sayles Hall,
How are you? For 133 years old, you’re looking great. You’ve been a loving host to student group rehearsals, SPEC events, and The Housing Games (RIP). Heck, you have even been to SPG! Have I mentioned you have the largest remaining Hutchings-Votey pipe organ in the world?! Seriously, thnks4themmrs and way to be you.
Hey, there is something I’ve wanted to talk to you about. I’ve been on staff here at BlogDH for three years and have never written a Flog. I’ve never really wanted to because I hate complaining and I seek to see the glass half-full as frequently as possible. Until now.
I’m quite bad at confrontation and don’t want this to come as a shock to you. Please bear with me as I try to express my feelings. I will even try to speak from the “I” perspective. What I’ve been meaning to tell you is that your bathrooms are literally the worst thing about this entire institution for higher learning.
Was that too harsh?
Let me explain myself. We can start by talking about the location of your facilities. Your only bathrooms are located in the basement of the building, which is an absurd amount of steps away from your third floor dungeon. I could also get into all of the sense that your stairs lack, but I digress.
Given my abnormally small bladder, I always face this dilemma as to whether I should commit myself to hiking the literal Oregon Trail to get to your facilities or if I should just suffer the bladder discomfort. Also, seriously my bad if I’m taking this the wrong way, but it seems that you are proud of this trek and wear it as a badge of honorable character. You really shouldn’t, Sayles. I dare you to have one more sign telling me that your only bathrooms are located in the basement. Also stop sugar-coating it by calling it “the lower level.” It is the basement.