Brown Men’s Basketball knocks off PC…again


Alright, so this season admittedly hadn’t gotten off to a roaring start for men’s basketball. Especially questionable results included a 21-point loss to a school called Austin Peay (to be fair, they have made March Madness at some point during my lifetime) and a 17-point loss to American (who did make March Madness last year, but as a really shitty 15-seed).

None of that matters, though, because there’s only one non-conference game you should care about: the annual intra-city game against PC, which occurred last night. In this biggest of spots, against a higher-pedigree program steeped in history, Bruno–as you may have guessed from the fact that we’re running a post on the game–delivered, with a 77-67 win.

That’s right, for the second time in three years, we can say that we have the best basketball team in Providence, and no one can stop us. Hey, everyone, we have the best basketball team in Providence! Yeah, see? No one stopped me.

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Sixth Man: Women’s Hockey


There are certain things you have to be willing to give up in you’re going to enjoy a women’s hockey game: namely, the hitting that really serves to make men’s games entertaining. No one gets crushed against the boards in a women’s hockey game–or if they do, the referees are sure to take it pretty seriously. Instead, it’s an arguably more fluid game, with the puck constantly in motion and far less likely to get stuck in a corner, buried in a scrum of swarming bodies. But still: no hitting.

Despite this crucial difference, there is a lot that is the same about the Brown men’s hockey and Brown women’s hockey experience. Most excitingly, Hermano!!!!! For those of you who missed my multiple men’s hockey posts way back in 2012–I’m sure that’s hardly any of you–I’ll give a brief description of Hermano(!!!!!). Hermano(!!!!!) is the nice Brown Athletics employee who drives the zamboni, the machine used to smooth the ice between periods. I don’t know if this is typical of other hockey teams, because I’m not a huge hockey fan, but Brown hockey treats Hermano(!!!!!) like a superstar. He gets an announcement befitting peak-era Michael Jordan from the PA guy, and then the scoreboard does a little graphic with flames around the word “Hermano!!!!!” He also gets to drive a flame-bedazzled zamboni. And, to be clear, Hermano(!!!!!) is a superstar.

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This Week in Sports: November begins with a bang


Too busy watching the sweet new Into the Woods trailer on a loop to watch the new NBA season?

Too occupied with shutting down Silk Road 2.0 to check out the excellent NFL action?

Simply don’t care about sports?

Here’s what you’ve been missing.

This Week in Sports

Winter Sports


This curling shot. I’m no religious curling fanatic, but I had to reevaluate my existence on this earth when I was presented with the beauty of that shot.

NBA Action


LeBron and the Cleveland Cavaliers have started the season 1-3, including a loss to the lowly Utah Jazz and a crushing 19-point defeat by the Portland Trail Blazers, after being projected by me to be “Good. Very good.” Is it too early to start worrying about the team? Probably. Does that stop me from doing it? No. I want this team to be fun to watch, and so far, the superstar trio of Kyrie Irving, Kevin Love, and LeBron are being outscored by an average of 7 points when they are all playing together. That’s not very fun.

Also on the subject of the Cavs, LeBron-lover Brian Windhorst wrote a story for ESPN detailing how LeBron is playing poorly on purpose in order to teach his teammates a lesson. What this lesson entails is still unclear…

Back to the NBA, where the Dallas Mavericks have been off to a pretty solid start, picking up wins over New Orleans and Boston. But even more solid is the rap that Dirk Nowitzki, Monta Ellis, and Chandler Parsons wrote and performed this week:

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Shut Out Trafficking comes to Brown this week


The National Consortium for Academics and Sport (NCAS) has joined forces with the U.S. Fund for UNICEF’s End Trafficking Project to create Shut Out Trafficking, a program that seeks to educate students on ten college campuses across the country about the large prevalence of human trafficking in the United States. This week, Shut Out Trafficking will be hosting events at Brown.

According to Shut Out Trafficking at Brown’s Facebook event page, this project seeks to engage athletes in the issue of human trafficking and use athletics as a vehicle to address this critical concern head-on. The project also hopes to “implement programming designed to involve and support athletes, coaches, athletics administrators, and members of the general student body in raising awareness about and exposing the hidden injustices of human trafficking, both globally and on a domestic level.” The page also says that the goal of the project is to “empower campus communities to speak out honestly and take action against these abuses.”

There will be two events hosted this week. On Monday, November 3rd, there will be a two hour event entitled “Shut Out Trafficking in Society Through Sport” which features Dr. Richard Lapchick, a human rights activist and internationally recognized expert on sports issues, Sarah Willbanks from UNICEF USA, Sarah DeCataldo from Day One, David Cohen and Rebekah Conway Roulier from Doc Wayne, and Larkin Brown from Soccer Without Borders. The panel will take place at 6p.m. in Smitty-B Room 106.

On Thursday, November 6th, the Royce Fellowships at Brown, the Sport and Development Project at Brown, and the UNICEF Club at Brown will be screening “Not My Life,” a independent film by Robert Bilheimer that documents contemporary slavery. The event will be held at 6p.m. in Wilson 102.

Eli Wolff, the co-director of the Royce Fellowship for Sport and Society, an overseer of the Sport and Development Project at Brown, and the primary contact for this event at Brown told Blog, “We are so excited to have Dr. Lapchick on campus and to collaborate with UNICEF USA to engage the campus on this important and emerging topic. The power of sport can serve as a vehicle for education,  awareness and action in the realm of sport and human rights, development and social change.”
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Sports alert! A beginner’s guide to the baseball playoffs


Our statisticians believe there is a roughly 100% chance the Red Sox won’t win this year’s World Series

As you probably were (not) aware of, the Major League Baseball playoffs begin tonight with a play-in game between the Kansas City Royals and Oakland Athletics. They continue tomorrow with the other play-in game (San Francisco Giants-Pittsburgh Pirates) before the real series start on Thursday.

If none of that made any sense, fear not! Blog is here to explain things.

All you need to know about the way the playoffs work is this: five teams in each league (American and National) make it. The two worst in each league–the ones already named above–play a single game against each other to determine who goes on and who goes home. Then the remaining eight teams are paired off into four “Division Series” in which the first team to win three games wins. Then the remaining four teams are paired up in “Championship Series” in which the first team to four games wins. Then the last two teams–the winners of the American and National Leagues, respectively–play in the World Series, which is also won by the first team to four games. The winner of the World Series wins everything!

But, you ask, which team should I root for? Or, more accurately, which teams are playing? Or perhaps, most accurately, why should I care? The final question we can’t answer, besides that baseball is, uh, our national pastime.

But consider: despite all the talk about the demise of baseball, revenues are at an all-time high and local TV ratings are (generally) very strong. So other people care, which means you should too! Now, to answer the other two questions, here’s a beginners rundown of the teams competing this October:

American League

Kansas City Royals


Sports are fun!

Two-sentence bio: The Royals are among the lovable underdogs of the year, having made their first playoffs in 29 years (29 years!!!!). Unfortunately, they’re not actually that good, having made it in despite one of the worst offenses in the league; they’ll rely on pitching and defense to advance past the play-in game and truly break their playoff-free streak.

Informed-sounding comment: “Boy, those Royals sure get going on the basepaths, don’t they?” [This is a reference to the team’s ability to steal a lot of bases.]

Players to name-drop: Starting pitcher James Shields; Closer Greg Holland; Left fielder Alex Gordon [above left]; Catcher Salvador Perez.

Most fun name: Mike Moustakas (third baseman).

Uniform quality: The Royals recently brought back their baby blue shirts to great effect, making them one of the more well-dressed teams around.

Should you root for them? Probably, yeah. Everyone loves a Cinderella story.

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Imagine 250+: Ra Ra Brunonia: Brown Stadium


Today, students and alumni alike will make the seemingly transcontinental trek up Elmgrove Avenue — clearly a made up place — to watch our beloved Brown Bears take on the Harvard Winklevi in a rousing match of hand-egg (see below and take note).

At the tailgates, middle-aged men (and women! and phes!), sipping on their b-o-u-r-b-o-n, will be far drunker than is socially acceptable, and undergrads will leave behind an aluminum mess to rival that of the People’s Climate March. At game time, however, they will all pile into what is probably only the second biggest pure concrete structure on campus to watch some good ole’ fashioned American Football.


But what about that large-ish — seriously, the Scili puts everything in perspective — concrete structure we’re standing in during our beat-down of the Excellent Sheep from Cambridge? Brown Stadium, which no alum has paid to name after him/herself (yet), has an impressive history to it.

According to Encyclopedia Brunoniana, the stadium opened in its current location in 1925 and can actually fit up to 27,646 people. We were so excited about our new digs that in the stadium’s opening year, we decided everyone would have to come to us to play. We’re not lazy; we promise!

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