Growlers will make your stomach growl

If you never quite filled the void in your heart and stomach left by beloved Spats (RIP), you’re not alone.

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RIP Shades Plus, you will be missed

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The rumors are true; today, Shades Plus will close its doors forever. No longer will $5.99 sunglasses be available to you on your walk home to/from Pembroke; no longer are we safe in the knowledge that a zebra mask, pink wig, or whoopee cushion are available to us at a moment’s notice.

I, for one, will really mourn the loss. Shades Plus is was a happy, super weird place that I have only visited under the most joyous of circumstances, i.e. spring weekend freshman year, when I needed cool/ironic sunglasses that I could step on and not feel stressed about. It was there every Halloweek, when all I needed to pull my outfit together was a colored hairspray or some fake blood, and in preparation for a friend’s birthday, when I knew a tacky, plastic, feathered crown would add a much needed finishing touch.

Shades Plus had all the things you need that you aren’t necessarily sure exist, like cupcake shaped erasers and syringe pens. As our more formal other half put it, “At Shades Plus, students would often purchase ‘random stuff, like fake mustaches,’ for fun or special holiday occasions.” There really is no other way to put it. Bye Shades Plus, we will miss you, especially on fun or special holiday occasions.


SNL’s Stefon’s guide to freshman parties

Who is Stefon?

Stefon, played by Bill Hader, is a reoccurring guest from the Weekend Update portion of SNL He is a sharp diva, with a dark edge, and hilariously quirky side. He is plugged into (what he thinks are) the best parties in NYC. His plans are odd, unique and always out there. If you do not know him already, watch the video below to get a glimpse of the genius of Stefon, or watch the video below because you love him already. Why aren’t you watching this already? If Stefon were to describe the freshmen party scene at Brown, this is what we think he’d say:

Stefon Final

Brown’s hottest party is…Metcalf 2nd floor lounge. If you and your friends are looking for an unsanctioned, rowdy time, hit up the lounge. To get in just say the password: your SAT score. The party starts at 8:45 and gets shut down at 9:15 by DPS. Don’t worry, just get there early. There is watered down Vodka, beers someone stole from their dad, and some oregano that someone is pretending is weed. Show up fashionably early, and leave fashionably…early?

babies and beer

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What to do this week: September 22 – 28

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Monday, September 22:

Event: The (Dis)United Kingdom: The UK after the Referendum
Time: 5:00 p.m.
Location: Watson Institute

A discussion led by Mark Blyth, Eoin McGuirk and Fiora MacPherson on the recent vote in Scotland to remain a part of the UK and the effects of the decision.

Event: Tales From a Journalist’s Visits to Other Planets: Ken Auletta Lecture
Time: 5:30 p.m.
Location: MacMillan 117

A talk delivered by Ken Auletta, a New Yorker columnist and author of five national bestselling non-fiction books. A reception and book-signing follows.

Event: Guantanamo Bay Teach-In
Time: 7 – 8.30 p.m.
Location: List 110

Presentations by two professors and one post-doctoral fellow will discuss the problematic, ongoing existence of the US military base in Guantanamo Bay. A Q&A and discussion groups will follow.

Event: Students on Israel and Palestine: Perspectives on the Gaza War
Time: 7 – 9.00 p.m.
Location: Petteruti Lounge

Students with various connections to the situation in Gaza will be a part of a panel discussing recent events. Also moderated by students, the event hopes for a big emphasis on Q&A.

Event: IC and GISP Info Dinner
Time: 7.00 p.m.
Location: The Underground

If you’re considering making your own concentration, class, or credit-earning internship, come and learn about the processes from those who know all about it. Plus, food.

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Best places on campus to check yourself out

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It’s no doubt that we live in the age of the “selfie,” to linguists’ dismay, but what does this really tell us about the underlying principals of current society? Ok, we’re not about to invoke Chomsky or get too technical here. In fact, TIME Magazine put it quite simply: our generation is a bunch of narcissistic assholes. Well, you’re in luck, kiddos, because the following list of the best places to check out your appearance on campus will help you become the best version of your “assholey-millennial” self!

For the record, I am physically repulsed by the word “millennial,” and I would push instead for the label “fabuluxe trailblazers,” but whatever, TIME, you win this one.

1. BioMed building facing Brown St.

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This is the quintessential checkout spot. The extremely reflective windows seem to go on for days, and allow you to catch a glimpse of your entire body in motion, because sometimes you just need to triple check that your skirt is obeying gravity on those windy autumn days. Also, apparently there are offices behind these windows. Cool, then, this has just confirmed my worry that a bunch of strangers may have gained insider’s access to my nostrils.

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Eating etiquette in shared study spaces

Library Food

Eating in study spaces is a regular activity for every student; we all must study, we all must eat, so naturally these two activities will overlap quite frequently. Given the fact that this daily habit is not going to change any time soon, it’s time, I think, to set some ground rules for eating in shared spaces.

We’re all guilty of it – we’ve all had food that we know is too loud to be eating in the Leung Gallery or too smelly to be consuming in the stacks of the Rock. I’m not naïve enough to believe that this is going to stop, though I think it’s time to call attention to some very-necessary study space eating etiquette.

Abolition or revolution is not necessary, but all I ask is for a deeper consideration of how what you eat affects those around you. There is a spectrum of acceptable study snacks, with the priority placed on choosing food that is quiet and that does not give off an odor that can be smelled from 20 feet away (I’m looking at you Kabob and Curry, Soban, Shanghai, Chipotle – wow, Thayer Street has a lot of stinky offerings). In addition to the obvious distraction that comes with the deafening crunch of potato chips, the overwhelmingly pungent smell of your bibimbap from Mama Kim’s makes me a) hungry, b) nauseous, and c) unable to focus on anything other than the nostril flaring and stomach grumbling that my body subconsciously engages in.

Next time you’re strategizing your meals for your midterm study binge, consider the sensorial vulnerabilities of your neighbors. A Blue Room muffin, a bagel, an orange, a turkey sandwich, salad, just as some examples, are ideal – they’re quiet to consume and relatively odorless. Kimchi, on the other hand, is simply not appropriate for the library; it’s just a fact.