Why don’t we have school today?

Not that we’re complaining; we’re just confused. Usually, we get off the third Monday (and Tuesday) in February in honor of President’s Day.

Thinking there had to be some plausible reason for the switch (outside of just standard registrar-related scheduling issues), we investigated.

Today is Single Tasking Day, honoring the idea that “multitasking is ineffective — and may cause brain damage.” Just what every Brown student currently camped out in the Rock was dying to hear.

On the other hand, there’s World Thinking Day, bringing you the opportunity to ponder more holistically (courtesy of the Girl Scouts).

St. Lucia celebrates independence today, while Florida remembers being handed from one owner to another.

But let’s get real for a minute. Maybe Brown is just trying to make a statement and return President’s Day to its truthful origins. George Washington was born on February 22, but the Uniform Monday Holiday Act (honestly; it’s real) ensures that the holiday will never actually fall on his birthday. (It always hits sometime between Feb. 15 and 21.)

So thank you, Brown, for teaching us the real meaning of Washington’s birthday.

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