Man, I love college. The independence, the self-discovery, the prevalence of fried and sugary goods… This is what dreams are made of. Still, I can’t say that I don’t miss my childhood days–and now more than ever, since finals are upon us. I mean, no one told me how nerve-wracking grocery shopping by yourself could be (especially when everyone at Whole Foods is beautiful and intimidating), or how terrifying calling your bank’s customer service is when they start bombarding you with security questions and you suddenly forget your own birthday. Sometimes, we just need to take a break from this freak show that is adulthood to feel like kids again. Luckily, there are plenty of ways to reconnect with your inner child here at Brown. So, close that NPR tab and put adulthood on hold, and read up!
Get turnt up in the Providence Place toy store
No, I do not mean to go pull a drunk uncle and pass out on top of the stuffed animals mountain. But please, do feel free to giddily peruse the action figure aisle, and don’t feel ashamed if you make inhuman noises after seeing the latest collection of Beanie Boos. Toys are wonderful, and they served as instruments for our creative growth when we were younger. That doesn’t mean we have to blatantly forget about them now that we’ve grown and become Internet-based life forms. May I remind you of the Toy Story movies? They’re totally based on real-life events, and no one can convince me otherwise.
Interact with babies, while simultaneously becoming a baby yourself
You can bet that wherever there’s a baby, there’ll be at least ten adoring students flocking around it (to the likely discomfort of the parents). These stinky chunky bundles of sunshine and joy just radiate a vitality that we sleep-deprived students crave, and being around them gives us an energy boost. When we were smaller, interacting with other babies or kids seemed so much easier, though. We were able to instantly make friends, and run off to play hide-and-seek without a care in the world. College students obviously can’t go frolicking through the main green with someone else’s child, but don’t be afraid to play with his/her little car, and engage in trivial conversation on whether Batman or Superman would win in a fight.
Enjoy that SpongeBob marathon while on the elliptical at the Nelly
SpongeBob SquarePants made me who I am today. He taught me the importance of perseverance and the value of friendship, a.k.a. learning how to tolerate that special friend. Also, it’s just darn funny. Remember how you laughed your ass off when Patrick tried to yodel in the Flying Dutchman episode? You know you did. As you grow up, you’ll feel pressured to forget about cartoons and indulge in more “mature” humor outlets, like the knee-slappers that are The New Yorker comics. Don’t give in, my friend. It’s a grey world of bland and contrived witticism out there, so when life hands you the opportunity to watch a sponge and a starfish drive a hamburger or royally piss off a cultured squid, you take it.
Go HAM at the playground
Whenever I pass by the playground on my way to Wickenden, I feel the strongest urge to drop my 2-ton backpack, run toward the swings, and never look back. The playground is a child’s version of a concert. Sure, you may encounter the occasional jerk that just wants to ruin the fun for everyone (in this case, the hefty kid who is dauntingly manning the slide entrance), but in general everyone comes here to forget about their worries (in this case, a child’s impending dentist appointment). You might be a grown person, but there is no shame in convincing your buddies to take a playground field trip and showing them your perfected swing leaps or unrivaled slide-climbing speed. Word of caution: the playground equipment can only support so much weight…
Order milk and cookies and feel empowered
A student’s idea of comfort food might be a double shot espresso with the usual plain bagel, because there’s nothing more comforting than actually being sentient during your 9 a.m. But what happened to the good ol’ days when chocolate chip cookies and a tall glass of milk were quality comfort food, and were acceptable any time of day? Don’t feel silly if this is all you really want next time you go to Blue State. Sure, ordering a small soy chai latte with a vegan pumpkin tea loaf gives you an air of sophistication and maturity, but cookies and milk nourish your soul. Bonus childhood points if you ask for your milk to be warmed.
Buy all the onesies!
Because onesies are the end all and be all of life. Daz it.