What would happen if the movies you love to watch during Halloweek took place here on campus? We’d get some spooky results.
WARNING: Some of this content may not be suitable for children (or for the more fragile members of the student body). Please note that the following scenarios do not reflect the reality of the Brown experience. I should also add a SPOILER ALERT for any of the following movies.
- The Brown Witch Project: A group of three friends, after hearing rumors of a party, decide to venture into Grad Center. They gradually realize that they can’t find the party OR the way out. One of them decides to film their endeavors as the students become more and more distraught. After days of wandering the concrete, riot-proof hallways, they think they hear EDM coming from someone’s room. They enter, and never come back. A few days later, a phone is found with the video evidence and released to the student body.
- The Village as The Bubble: The entire Brown community is terrified of leaving College Hill, believing that terrible monsters live outside the Brown bubble. In the end, the horror stories turn out to be a conspiracy, and all that exists outside the bubble is some delicious food and a working train system that will take you to Boston for $10.
- Chucky as The Circle Dance. What if those funny aluminum people could come to life and wreak havoc across campus? Actually, that’s terrifying. Let’s move on to something lighter.
“It’s the Great Paxson, Charlie Brown!”: This piece would chronicle the Halloween of two Brunonian friends. Let’s call this dynamic duo Linus and Charlie. Linus is convinced that if the two camp out all night on the Main Green, Christina Paxson will appear in genie form and grant them wishes. Specifically, he plans to ask for a return of the Ivy Room Mac and Cheese. Charlie–although he’s reluctant about missing all of Brown’s Halloween festivities (aka Ultra), and thinks his friend might be a bit unhinged–decides to suck it up and stick with Linus anyway. The two end up falling asleep and DPS wakes them up first thing in the morning, concerned that they may have gotten too turnt the night before.
- The Shining: This classic would take place in Minden, which used to be an old hotel. It really is the perfect set. Picture your favorite campus doppelgangers chilling in the hallway as the creepy twins.
Beetlejuice as Fishcojuice: Two freshman fear that they don’t know how to “do college” very well. By saying “Fishcojuice” three times in a row, they summon the ghost of Fischco to help them. Picture Christina Paxson doing this at the Ratty.
- The Silence of the Lambs: On second thought, even from a purely theoretical standpoint, I don’t want this movie to have anything to do with our campus. Ever. This is how I feel just thinking about it:
- A Brunonian’s Sixth Sense— “I see dead Keeney.”: A freshman is somehow able to see and interact with all the things on Brown campus that have been eliminated over the years: the Gate, the old version of Keeney where you can freely walk the hallways between Jameson, Archibald, and Everett, even Tedeschi‘s. He looks to an older student for guidance, and in the end (PLOT TWIST) it turns out that the student was actually an alum in denial about the fact that he had graduated.