Like many of you beautiful nerds, I happened to host for ADOCH this past week. I, being myself, had no problem with it when my pre-frosh asked if it was OK if he (note: I live in a gender-neutral room) changed in the room. I remained fine with it when he added that the pants have built-in underwear (not sure if that’s cool or ill-advised) and that there would be a bare butt involved. But here’s the interesting bit: I didn’t even get to assure him that it was fine before, almost as if he were remembering something he’d forgotten, he said, “Oh, but you’re in college: You’re probably pretty used to stuff like this.”
Which brings me to a concept I’ve discussed with several of my friends, one which doesn’t actually seem to ring true: the idea that college is Hook-Up Central.
This past summer, amidst all sorts of college-related existential crises and the typical post-high school hurrahs, I determined that I was going to be a thot at Brown. I mean that in the most positive way, mind you. I looked forward to an imagined future in which I would be free of my high school identity and prepared myself to enter the college world, hopefully with enough confidence to submerge myself in what I imagined was an active sexual scene.
It’s been almost a year now, and I’ve found college to be less of a hyper-sexual Saturnalia and more of a…casual continuation of life. In spite of my expectations, it’s not like someone’s asking you to hook up every time you go to a party, nor is everyone having sex. In fact, a recent poll conducted by The Herald revealed that 24.5 percent of students have not hooked up (this includes make-outs) with anyone while at Brown. For first-years, the figure was even higher, coming in at 33.2 percent.
So, it turns out I was wrong. The sexplosion I had anticipated turned out to be based on a largely unfounded, socially constructed image, which is honestly a relief. Obviously, some college students are sexually active, but not as many are as I anticipated when I was getting ready to come to Brown.
To any of you out there who had the same preconceptions about the college hook-up scene as I did going in, don’t worry about it if you haven’t hooked up or don’t hook up as often as you feel other people do. You’re not the only person on campus who isn’t getting it, and by no means is there anything undesirable or lacking about you if you don’t have an opportunity to embrace your inner thot.
In other words: If you’re not hooking up, just keep doing you. And don’t fret — you’re not alone.